Millions of Funny Jokes, Status Messages, and Thoughtful Quotes

New to Witty Profiles?

We are a family of 394,936 people who write funny jokes, bad puns, short stories, and love letters. Express yourself without being judged and make new friends.

Join Us

Already a member? Sign in.

 forget password?
             When you have nobody in your life to tell you when you're wrong then you truly 
    Have noTHInG.



Paint yourself a picture
Of what you wish you looked like
Maybe then they just might
Feel an ounce of your pain

format by dontsellyourselfshort 
Stop being tormented by
everyone else's reaction to you.

roots before branches
Get To Know Me Uncomfortably Well
1. What is your middle name? Anglea
2. How old are you? 17
3. What is your birthday? October 5th
4. What is your zodiac sign? Libra
5. What is your favorite color? Pink
6. What's your lucky number? 5
7. Do you have any pets? Lucky the dog <3
8. Where are you from? Chicago
9. How tall are you? Not very ;D
10. What shoe size are you? kids 3, women 5
11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 10
12.What was your last dream about? i didnt sleep long enough to dream
13.What talents do you have? staying up til 4am & still functioning, loving bands more than anything else, my ability to lose things, pretty decent writer, style, not caring what people think about me (Those are talents right?)
14.Are you psychic in any way? I wish 
15. Favorite song? I legit can't do favorites
16. Favorite movie? 10 Things  Hate About You, Cloudy w/ a Chance of Meatballs, John Hughes
17. Who would be your ideal partner? funny enjoys music
18. Do you want children? eh
19. Do you want a church wedding?  idrk
20. Are you religious? kinda inbetween
21. Have you ever been to the hospital? ye
22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? Almost
23. Have you ever met any celebrities? Marianas Trench! ♥
24. Baths or showers? ugh baths
25. What color socks are you wearing? not wearing socks actually (WHO AM I?)
26.Have you ever been famous? beside being recognized for this play I was in not really
27.Would you like to be a big celebrity? ye 
28.What type of music do you like? Mostly Pop Punk/ Alternative bands, w/ alittle screaming here & there, oh & I LOVE Taylor Swift.
29.Have you ever been skinny dipping? no
30.How many pillows do you sleep with? none
31.What position do you usually sleep in? like i'm praying cuz yall need Jesus
32.How big is your house? rad dad sized,
33.What do you typically have for breakfast? coffee
34.Have you ever fired a gun? yeah no
35.Have you ever tried archery? technically
36.Favorite clean word? aesthetic, rad
37.Favorite swear word? f.uck
38.What's the longest you've ever gone without sleep? uh my whole life?
39.Do you have any scars? ye 
40.Have you ever had a secret admirer? im typically the secret admirer
41.Are you a good liar? I like to think I am but I've got some tells
42.Are you a good judge of character? ye 
43.Can you do any other accents other than your own? not really
44.Do you have a strong accent? nah I just have a surprsingly deep voice
45.What is your favorite accent? Irish
46.What is your personality type? INFP 
47.What is your most expensive piece of clothing? my A.W.G Jacket
48.Can you curl your tongue? ye
49.Are you an innie or an outie? Innie
50.Left or right handed? rightie
51.Are you scared of spiders? no
52.Favorite food? fried chicken, cheese fries
53.Favorite foreign food? tie between Chinese & Mexican
54.Are you a clean or messy person? Messy
55.Most used phrase?  "I mean" "I like bands" "Squad Up"
56.Most used word? as of late Yo, bands, honestly
57.How long does it take for you to get ready? Too long usually
58.Do you have much of an ego? nah
59.Do you suck or bite lollipops? LICK (I ESCAPED THE MATRIX) 
60.Do you talk to yourself? only all the time
61.Do you sing to yourself? who doesnt?
62.Are you a good singer? eh
63.Biggest fear? the unknown, death, growing up
64.Are you a gossiper? I'm more of a ranter
65.Best dramatic movie you've seen? N/A
66.Do you like long or short hair? Medium (Just call me Keanu Reeves at this point)
67.Can you name all 50 states of America? Most of the time
68.Favorite school subject? English usually love the teachers (& they love me back), genuinley interested in the curriculm
69.Extrovert or Introvert? Ambivert
70.Have you ever been scuba diving? no.
71.What makes you nervous? growing up,
72.Are you scared of the dark? ye
73.Do you correct people when they make mistakes? just friends
74.Are you ticklish? Knope.
75.Have you ever started a rumor? no way jose 
76.Have you ever been in a position of authority? nah
77.Have you ever drank underage? here & there
78.Have you ever done drugs? Knope 
79.Who was your first real crush? This kid Alex in kindergarten
80.How many piercings do you have? ears
81.Can you roll your Rs? one of many speed bumps during Spanish class
82.How fast can you type? not very
83.How fast can you run? Katie doesn't run
84.What color is your hair? blonde, with red tips
85.What color are your eyes? brown 
86.What are you allergic to? nothing #blessed
87.Do you keep a journal? nah
88.What do your parents do? dad's an electircal engineer& my mom is a building manager.
89.Do you like your age? Not as sweet as 16, but I get to make more All Tome Low refernces so
90.What makes you angry? Judgmental people,
91.Do you like your own name? ye
92.Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?girl: Amanda w/ the nickname of Mandy, Hayley Boys: Alex, Rian, Josh
93.Do you want a boy a girl for a child? doesn't really matter to me
94.What are you strengths? being chill, pretty open minded,remembering song lyrics 
95.What are your weaknesses? remembering everything else, remembering sunday, doing things I have no interest in, procrasination
96.How did you get your name? I think it was Big Nana's name
97.Were your ancestors royalty? probs not
98.How long was your longest relationship? lol 
99.Color of your bedspread? Zebra with pink border
100.Color of your room? Baby pink

3. Speak your mind. Don't let people walk over you and take your love for granted. Be honest and stand up for yourself. You're not the opinion of someone else. They see what they want to see. Hear what they want to hear. Twist the truth. Don't let them belittle you and make you feel unworthy of love. Everyone has flaws that will be pinpointed. Don't let others use them as an advantage. Turn it around. Accept them so they can't use it as a weapon.
He is 6 foot 2 and has a gunshot scar on one of his arms and a mouth that tastes like forevers and a voice that sounds like promises no one can ever keep. His touch is like sticking your finger in an electrical socket and even though I’m not sure if I could pick him out in a lineup anymore I would try, try, try.

He was messy and pure and desperate and calming all at once. He was a walking oxymoron that I was addicted to making sense of and creating a definition of in our days. He was smoke rings that couldn’t be broken and a smell that still lingers on the hemlines of my shirts.

don't speak, just use your touch

People You Might Like
  • Steve
  • Skimrande
  • dontsellyourselfshort
  • trouvaille*
  • war is over*
  • musicure
  • Amenah
Newest Wittians
  • eli estanga*
  • 1300 On The Move*
  • gcbottletrial
  • jela
  • lizzdark0
  • haynescornelius090
  • madelinee