AleveyiaMaieDay
Joined: June 10, 2012
Last Seen: 1 decade
user id: 307361
Location: Hell
Gender: F
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That girl up in the left hand side of your screen? Thats me.
Im a bottled up mess of emotions with serious trust issues.
Quotes by AleveyiaMaieDay
Someone who doesnt walk away when things get rough.
Someone who realizes relationships aren't easy.
Someone i can trust.
Someone whose committed.
I just want someone who cares.
Someone who loves me for me.
I just wanted to say goodbye. At least maybe some of you will read this. and maybe you'll even feel something..
I've recently lost the love of my life..
I cant cope with this.. i've been trying for the last 4 weeks but its too hard. Its too much pain.
I cant deal.
I love him. He's my everything and he's my best friend. He's all i have. But i dont have anything now.
he doesnt want me.
i cant live with the feeling of not being wanted by the only person i truly care about.
im never going to be good enough.
so tonight..
i've decided im going to end my life.
I love you Ryan ♥
Chapter 10
But i was wrong.
Once i he'd left and i'd gone inside to finish explaining to my parents that it wasn't my fault he was here. I didnt know he was coming and its not like we had done anything but talk anyway. That's if you count extreme kissing as talking. After i'd finished "explaining myself" i grabbed the house phone and ran to my room. I sat there and waited for him to call.
The phone never rang.
"why am i so stupid!!!!!" I slapped myself on the forehead.
I'd fallen for his bullcrap again. Fallen for his lies. All he was doing was trying to keep me close incase it didnt work out with his new girl. I was just back up. As usual. Boys always seem to look past the nice, and caring girls, and instead they see the who res. The bi tches that only minipulate their brains just to make themselves feel better. God forbid if they ever actually felt something for one of them.
I slapped my forhead again. Then once more. I didnt stop until my hand started to burn. I had been sitting in my room for what seemed like hours since he'd left. I searched my room for my cell phone, finding it on the floor near my window. I clicked the clear button, and it lit up telling me it was 10:23.
I had school tomorrow. It was the last day. Im just going to skip. There's no point in going now. He's just going to act like none of this happened anyway.
I called my voicemail to see if he'd tried to call and had left a message. Just as the operator began to speak to tell me to enter my password, there was a faint beep. I held the phone away from my ear and looked at the screen.
New Text Message From:
Ryan
sent: 7:34
delivered: 10:37
"Can i bring you home after school tomorrow?"
sorry for the delay readers! i haven't had wifi :(
hope you all are still reading <3
do
you think that we could play another
game?
maybe I could win this time.
I kinda like the misery you put me through.
The Fighter
Chapter 8
part 2
I dont know what i was thinking. I guess i wasn't thinking. We just kept kissing. He rolled on top of me, and we kept kissing. I finally pulled away, pushed him off of me and scooted a few inches away from him. He looked at me inisantly. Just like he always did. He never did anything wrong. He as Mr. perfect. Everything always seemed to be my fault, but when it wasn't my fault and i was upset about it, it was "no big deal". He'd never listened to my feelings, or maybe we'd still be together. Maybe i wouldnt of tried to kill myself if he would of at least listened to me. Maybe, just maybe.
I just wanted him to know how i felt.
It didnt seem to matter to him. He'd came here knowing i'd come crawling right back to him. I was desperate. I loved him. Not just the stupid little kid kind of love either. I was totally head over heels for this boy. And it seemed like he could care less. He just kept hurting me.
Its my fault really. I was the one who kept going back to him. But can you blame me? I loved the guy, he was my bestfriend. F uck. He was my life. Even if he didnt love me like i loved him, i was determined to make it happen. And i wasnt going to give up either.
I looked at him to see him starring at me. His eyes puffy. Then they widened.
"What?" I asked him.
"Someone's here.."
Sh it.
Sorry for the delay guys. I've been really stressed out lately, and couldnt bring myself to keep writing. But i hope i havent lost any of you readers!
Thanks for sticking with me ♥
The Fighter
Chapter 8
part one
"You still love me..?" i choked out the words.
"Kat, i always will. I almost died today.. A-"
"So you have to almost die to realize you love me?" I was furious.
"No! It just made me realize how stupid i was and how much i love you"
"You don't love me. You keep hurting me. You dont do that to someone you love. You dont hurt someone you love and make them depressed. You dont even wanna know how bad you've hurt me this time!" I flashed back to waking up in the woods, then to the bridge.
Both failed suicidal attempts. I wonder what he would do if he knew that, would he care?
I looked at him, his eyes brimmed red and swollen. Holding back tears. They mirrored mine. This all made no sense to me. He breaks up with me for no reason, then shows up to my house saying he loves me. I thought he hated me. He was mean enough.
"You don't have to believe me.. bu-"
"So you came here thinking that you were gonna get me back by crying and telling me that you almost died?" I cut him off. "What did you expect by coming here?"
"No, no i didnt expect that. I didnt even think you'd let me in. But i came anyway. I hoped for the best i guess. I just had to tell you.. But i do love you, but you dont have to believe me. I just want you to know. I care about you and i never stopped." He looked me in the eyes.
I dont know why i did it. I was so angry at him for doing this to me again. Breaking my heart just to come back as to say "just kidding!"
But i kissed him.
And he kissed back.
♥ thanks for reading ♥
Can't stop the hunger for your love.
_______________________
What a beautiful mess I made .. ♥
Chapter 7
Part 2
"Um.." I said under my breath, but loud enough so he could hear.
He stood up and walked to the window, fidling with his hands.
"I almost died today Kat."
"Okay?"
"I was cutting down trees with Dad and one fell the wrong way, almost crushed me.."
"Ohh.." I said confused.
What did this have to do with me?
"Yes.. So when that tree was coming at me, i thought about you." He looked at me. "All i was worried about was you."
I became mad. Did he come here thinking i was going to get back together with him? He ignored me for a week and a half then decides before he's about to "die" that he still wants me. What. The. H ell.
"So what?" I grimanced.
He came over to me and sat on the bed next to me.
"I just wanted you to know.. I still love you." He sniffled. Crying.
Great.
Tell me what you think about my story? I'd love feedback :)
make life so difficult
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