Ash_leigh*

Status: 2014 <3
Joined: August 23, 2012
Last Seen: 1 decade
user id: 326950
Location: NJ
Gender: F

Quotes by Ash_leigh*


Depresso:
The feeling you get when you've run out of coffee


Reasons to be a mermaid:

- no pants
- no periods
- perfect hair
- you can lure men to their death
- free clam bra



How to kiss a boy:

1. Grab his waist
2. Slip your hand in his pocket
3. Steal his wallet
4. Don't even kiss him
5. Just run 




Ok so do we all just agree that
Taylor  Swift could make a screamo album in spanish and she'd sti ll be categorized as a country artist


 

Fun prank:

buy a real handgun and paint the nozzle tip bright orange
so it looks like a plastic toy gun.  pick a fight with a thug.  
pull out the gun.  he will laugh.  shoot him.  he will die.

(side note: you will be arrested for this)



When someone walks slower than me:  omfg your slow butt is clogging up the hallway come on put some step in your pep grandma

When someone walks faster than me:  jesus christ are you on the run from the police this isn't a race you can tone i t down usain bolt

When someone walks at the same pace as me: who gave you creeper permission to walk with me get the heck away before I call the cops




 
Snowman:  Hey  
Snowman: Do you want to know a secret  
Snowman: ...
Snowman: It's raining my  f l e s h
 

 
 

When does hibernation start
Because I am 100% participating in that
 

Me: Siri tell me a joke

Siri: *turns on front camera*



Job appilcations are stupid.

Application: 
Why do you want to work for us?
Me: Well I've always had a passion for frozen yogurt...
Me:  IM BROKE