_geronimo_*

Just being honest here man,
Voodoo Child is my jam.

Okay, real talk:
"Drown" by BMTH is a great song. So what if Oli isn't screaming, or if it isn't as hardcore anymore? Go listen to something like Capture The Crown or Tear Out The Heart if you want something hardcore. The guys obviously worked hard on this song, and wanted to try something new. And I think it's great. If you don't, oh well. No one is forcing you to listen to it, go listen to their old stuff. Just don't hate on them for giving something new a go.

I'm sorry I'm the way that I am. 
I find it so hard to change to be the person you want me to be,
But it's really hard,
It makes me want to cry,
I hate disappointing you,
I hate that I'll be nothing but a shadow,
I would love to be the person you want me to be,
And I try,
I really do.
But I can't help that I am who I am,
This is no longer a bad habit,
It's much more than that.

• click to see this quote •

"But I'd trade all of my tomorrows for a single yesterday."
- Me and Bobby McGee by Janis Joplin

My friends don't like that I like metal. They reckon it's satanic and has no meaning. They call it rubbish and all that. I know sometimes I play it out loud, but that's because I want to express how cool I find a band or something and I want to show them that metal isn't satanic or rubbish. But it's always: "Turn that crap off, Julia!". I hate it. 

Metal, to me, has more meaning than the things they listen to. One friend even asked 'Hey, do you find it offensive when we diss your music?'. She wasn't asking to see if it hurt me, she was asking to see if she could diss it. And I said 'Yeah, a little.' 

Metal isn't satanic. It isn't rubbish. It doesn't have no meaning. I respect their music taste, yet when I listen to my music, it's always 'Julia's being emo again.'. This is also another thing I hate about going to an all girl school. I don't go around hating 1D, or 5SOS or anything like that. That's because I know people like them and it will hurt their feelings if I say anything. Yeah, if my friends say someone like,  I don't know, Miley Cyrus was cool, I usually say 'She's not that great'. But that's all I say. 

One of my friends asked me to make a playlist for one of my other friends, and I had assure them that it wasn't metal. I've told them a million times that I don't only listen to metal. And the friend who asked me to make the playlist was actually surprised with what I came up with. I know they don't like metal, so why would I put a ton of metal about love in there?

Coming home and listening to Bring Me The Horizon or Of Mice & Men is like an escape from reality. Oli and Austin are screaming for me when I'm screaming on the inside. I find it so hard to show my emotions to people. Sometimes it slips through the cracks and I just cry. My parents don't like that I listen to metal. They say my music sucks, when they haven't even taken the time to listen to it. I don't expect them to like it, I would just like for them to accept it. 

These people, such as Austin or Oli or Chris, are my idols. They've had real issues. They've had to climb to the top without having a seat reserved for them when they finally got there. I love how these people express what they've been through or how they're feeling. It helps to feel like I'm not the only one, along with their many fans, that can relate. 

Sorry for the rant.

Everyone has felt alone in this world, okay?
Everyone has problems, some equal or worse to your own. 
Everyone has internal battles.
Everyone has felt like a piece of sh[i]t.
Everyone has been called a name.
Everyone has had labels.
Everyone has been bullied in some way.
Everyone is still having to carry on with life.
Everyone has these things splashed on their canvases.
You aren't the only one.