ONE DIRECTION ONE DIRECTION ONE DIRECTION ONE DIRECTION HOLY HALO
ONE DIRECTION’S IN FRONT OF ME.
I go absolutely mental. I start screaming… and I don’t
appear to stop, do i?
And I eventually manage to calm myself down.
“Happy Birthday Ruby!” say One Direction,
“BEST. BIRTHDAY. PRESENT. EVER!!!” she squeals,
“Amen to that.”
We hi-five eachother.
So we’re both a little bit calmed down by now, but I’m
still bobbling a little bit, and Ruby’s grinning like a
So One Direction’s standing behind us, and Ellen says:
“Anything you’d like to say to these boys?”
“Um, yes.” I reply. After a pause, I say:
“I know we only met but let’s pretend it’s
Again, the audience erupts into laughter.
Ruby then follows:
“I need a new bucket list.”
Again, the audience laughs.
“And, we’ll be right back with more Ruby Croft and
Alaska Merino right after the break!”
No more cameras.
And we get to actually talk to 1D…. like, seriously.
Living in Linden Grange, Ohio?
“So, Ruby.” Says Hazza.
“You’re a Kiwi?” he asks.
“Do you surf?” interrupts Niall
“Do cows moo?”
“I’ll be taking that as a yes then.”
“I would be worried if you took it as a no.”
“Do you play any instruments?” asks Liam.
“No, not really. I can play about three songs on the
“And what are they?”
“Someone Like You, I Will Survive, and All That
“You have an amazing musical talent.”
“Well, I guess. But then again, I can’t dance. At all!
But I make up for that with my acting skills.”
“I think you can dance, but you don’t want to.”
“Really? Okay, we’re starting this. From right now,
“Okay, I’m terrified.”
“Thirty seconds till camera!” says the cameraman.
“You did not just call me carrots.”
“Oh yes I did.”
Ellen comes back, and sits in her chair again.
“Hello, we’re back with Alaska Merino, Ruby Croft, and
Cue the audience clapping.
“Ruby, it’s your birthday today!”
“Yes! 21st of Febuary!”
The audience cheers.
“Well, I believe the boys over there have another present for
“Seriously. I just completed my bucket list right there, what
else could I possibly get?”
“You and Alaska could come on tour with us… and
Author’s Note: ooooh, this plot twist tastes spicy!!!!