DevieWevie

Status:
Joined: May 17, 2010
Last Seen: 5 years
user id: 109308
 


So yeah...
Hello there(:
My name is Devon
I'm 18! :D
I'm a California girl.
Born and raised.
I started this profile when I was 15.
I wanted to share some things I've leaarned.

 


Quotes by DevieWevie

Hi, I'm Devon.
When I was a baby, my mom and dad split up.
My mom remarried when I was around 5 or 6.
I had a pretty good childhood I suppose.
Except, I used to throw really bad fits.
I know what you're thinking, "Who doesn't around that age?"
Well, mine lasted until I was probably 10 or 11.
That was around the time I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder.
Things were a bit rocky after that, but I managed.
Then, last year when I was 14, I went from being sort of depressed all the time, to extremely depressed all the time.
I started self harming.
In May of 2011, I was admitted into a mental hospital for 5 days.
I got myself back on track, and I was fine.
Until August of 2011.
I started self harming again due to my newly found attraction in my best friend who's a girl.
However, in November I confessed to her that I was bisexual.
She confided in me that she was the same.
Skip to January 13th of 2012.
That was the day I asked her out.
That was also the day she said yes.
Things were good.
We both struggled with eating disorders together and self harm.
Unfortunately, on March 11th 2012, she took her own life.
I've remained cut free for a few months now, but it's increasingly difficult with her being gone and such.
Thank you for reading.♥

I need my witty girls right now.
On Monday, my best friend committed suicide.
All I really need is someone to talk to.
Even if you've never know what I'm going through.
Please, anyone?
Even just a fav to let me know I'm not alone would help.
Everyday I fight a war against myself.
A war to wake up.
A war to get out of bed.
A war to be grateful for having another day.
It's hard.
So, so hard.
It's easy for people to say they understand, and maybe to some extent they do.
But, do they know how it feels to be depressed, have low self esteem, have anxiety, and self image issues, be bipolar, struggle with self harm?
Do they know how it feels to be so uncomfortable in their own skin that they push people away from them?
Do they know how it feels to sit there and see your best friend, the person you're in love with, struggle with all the same things as you?
Or how it feels to not know how to help them without sounding like a hypocrite?
I just want to bleed and never stop.
I just want to sleep and never wake up.
I just want to die.
Harry Potter or die

 
 
But you were too stupid to see

she was right in front of you
 



 
 
You love her, and I get it.
But I want you.
I want your smile looking into my face.
I want your body pressed against mine while we dance stupidly.
I want your hand in mine as we run around screaming.
I want your lips against mine while we laugh about nothing.
But most of all,
I want you to be mine.





 
Always know that I have a special place for you in my little wasted heart.

I honestly cannot remember why I fell for you in the first place.
I mean, look at who you've become.
It's shameful, really.

 
 
 
It's okay, feel free to stand there and watch me hurt after you destroyed me piece by piece.
I mean, that is what you do best.