DuckRepairer

i spend my nights awake lying next to an empty bottle of advil and an unforgiving void yelling into blank paper and my skin "where did i go wrong with you?"

I love you like Sheldon loves his spot

I love you more than Spongebob loves jelly fishing. Sandy loves karate. Mr. Krabs loves money. And Squidward loves his clarinet. Baby I need you like Plankton needs the Krabby Patty Formula❤️

You know that feeling you get when you finish an amazing book? That I do not know what to do with my life, what am I supposed to think about now type feeling? I can not help but hate and love it all at the same time.

"Your hair is winter fire, January embers, my heart burns there too."
~ Stephen Kings' It

Of course I am weird! Normal is boooring

Love is in the air? Wrong. Niteogen, oxygen, agron, and carbon dioxide are in the air.

Of course I talk to myself sometimes I need expert advice

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and ball of string in the counter. She says confused, "Sir, I though you were looking for a box of tampons for your wife?" He answers "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers cause it's 'soooo much cheaper' so I figure if I have to roll my own so does she."