EmoTional_WreckXxXxXxX

Status:
Joined: July 8, 2013
Last Seen: 8 years
user id: 365485
Gender: F

Quotes by EmoTional_WreckXxXxXxX

I don't know what to do anymore
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love

7 months12 days14 hoursAnd I'm still in love with you.

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love
I miss myself
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sad
I still, after two months, find myself still up at 3:00 in the morning just crying until I have no more tears.
I still, after two months, find that I am still deeply in love with the man who broke my heart.
I still, after two months, find that I have made plenty of new scars that line my wrists and thighs.
I still, after two months, find that I havent eaten more than a single bite since the last time I saw you.

But...

Finally, after two months, I have smiled at myself in the mirror again
Finally, after two months, I have brushed through my hair in attempt to look pretty.
Finally, after two months, I have found a reason to put forth at least a little effort.
Finally, after two months, I do not want to die.

And now...

I found someone else.
I found someone who wants me
            and doesn't want me to change...
I found someone that I can have to myself
            and won't have to question their loyalty...
I found someone to help me satisfy my needs
            and will go out of their way to make me feel safe...
I found someone that will let me get high around him
            and will buy me cigarettes and drugs...
I found someone that I appreciate
            and I don't have to fight for him...
I found someone who won't judge me by my scars
            and will still hug me after Iv'e bled...
I found someone...
            and I think I might make it out alive...
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status
Today one of my friends saw my scars and cuts on my wrist. I tried to shake it off as nothing, but she insisted I tell her about it and show her my arm... I thought she was going to be a loving friend about it, but instead, she grabbed my wrist, twisted it, and yelled at me. She said I deserved to die and to go to hell because of what I do. This was in the middle of my study hall, too...

Usually, I can just ignore what people say, but coming from a best friend, I'm starting to believe it. I'm starting to think, maybe I do truely belong in hell.
5 3 EmoTional_WreckXxXxXxX EmoTional_WreckXxXxXxX
school
I recently discovered that  I am addicted to 2 things:
Moster Energy Drinks & Self Harm

I do not know which is worse. They both calm me. They both help me. They both can kill me.
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update

I tried to stay strong.                                                                                                                                                      I smile and laugh.
I did it for you.                                                                                                                                                      Your'e the reason my heart still beats.
I kept my head up.                                                                                                                                                      I didn't cry today.
I told my friends I was happy.                                                                                                    I dont think they care, though.
I lied to my family.                                                                                                                                                     They don't suspect a thing.
I never let them see.                                                                                                                                                      They couldn't handle the truth.


                                                  My nightmares have won.
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breaking
     I wish i could be skinny

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sad
Just because I'm his nothing, doesn't mean I'm not her
everything.
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love
My 80 year old grandmother just gave me $20 for always helping her,. I told her I loved her and she said the world needs more of me.... I cried. This is the first time I have felt loved by any of my family members in so long. She is in a wheelchair, so she needs 24/7 attention, and I'm the one who's usually with her. I never thought of it as a chore, but it's not my favorite thing to do. Now, I think of this as a privilege... I love her. 
21 1 EmoTional_WreckXxXxXxX EmoTional_WreckXxXxXxX
love