Joined: February 20, 2011
Last Seen: 9 years
user id: 154059

Bethany, I'm sorry. I've been a selfish idiot. But I miss you, so much. I know you'd want me to be happy, to celebrate the fact that you really lived, even if it was only for 13 years... But it's nearly impossible. Every time I'm in a good mood, I suddenly think "How can you be happy? Your best friend is gone. You'll never see her amazing smile or hear her laugh again. She's gone."
I hate it. I hate cancer.
I love you.

James | 14 | East London


Quotes by JamesLovesBeth

One year today.
On the 28th of February 2011, I lost my best friend to cancer.
She was only 13 years old.
I can't believe it's only been one year... It feels like so much longer.
For the past 12 months, I've been feeling so... empty.
I miss her so much... She was too young today.
28th February, 2011. I will never forget that day.
Rest In Peace, Bethany.
I love you.
- James


Today is my best friend's 14th birthday..
She died almost 9 months ago.. R.I.P Bethany / LetTheFlamesBegin .. I hope you're partying with your dad and brother now. I love you. I promise I always will. ♥


It's my best friend's 14th birthday in 2 days..
I don't know how I'm going to survive. :'/
- R.I.P Bethany.


We are sick and we are tired,
We're all fools and worthless liars.

I'm made in England
I call it my kingdom
She may let me down,
she would never take a bow for me
Sold down the river,
Scream 'til they hear ya
And I'm still standing proud,
even as every town has fallen down to its knees.


Nearly 7 months.

I've seen people here
making 'Fave this and I'll rate you out of 10' quotes, and they rate others 2.
TWO. Do you actually know how that can hurt people? Do you know how much it can lower a girl's self-esteem? Do you know how insecure it can make them feel?
I know this sounds really cheesy and everything, but if I ever made one of those quotes, I would give everyone 10. You all deserve it.


I'll stop the whole world
[  I ' l l   s t o p   t h e   w h o l e   w o r l d  ]
From turning  into  a  monster
& Eating us alive.   <3


This time 1 month ago,
I would have just been sitting on my bed,  staring at the wall, wishing that I could see
her again.  I would have refused to be happy,  and every time I was in a good mood I
would suddenly think "James,  how can you be happy?  Your best friend,  the person
who you loved the most,  the one person who really understood you...  She's gone.    
You'll never see her beautiful smile or hear her laugh again.  She's gone."
& Now?  Now I'm going to stop being a selfish idiot.  She would have wanted me to be
happy,  she always hated me being sad.  Truth is,  when I started school,  I was blind.
I was always laughed at for being blind,  and Bethany was the only one who didn't make
fun of me at some stage.  Since then,  I recovered from my blindness (don't ask how.)
and Bethany was still my best friend.  I made more friends,  but Bethany was always
the closest.  I really loved her.  Like I said,  she always hated me being sad,  and since
she died in front of me on that day - February 28th, 2011 - I've been more than sad.
I've been suicidal.  But there's no more of that now.  I'm not going to die for her,  I'm
going to live for her.  It's what she wants.  I'm going to smile as often as I can,  and I'm
going to celebrate the fact that she really lived, even if it was only for 13 years.             
I'm on the road to recovery.

I love you,  Bethany.
Rest in Peace.



You don't just
"get over" your best friend dying.
But, I suppose I'm recovering.
Bethany, I'm sorry. I've been a selfish idiot. But I miss you so much.