Tired
Every day is the same thing, and I'm tired of it. I think too
much and it makes me sad and stressed out. I'm so sick of
hoping for something that will never happen, and I feel so stupid
and gullible. You cause me more pain than happiness. I keep
telling myself that I'm better than that and I can do better,
but I keep going back to you. I'm not even upset, hurt or
angry anymore. Just TIRED. Tired of putting in more effort than I
recieve. Tired of holding on for nothing. Tired of believing all
your lies. Tired of you proving me wrong every time. Tired of
getting my hopes up and being disappointed again. I WANT TO MOVE
ON, but I can't. Maybe I'm even tired of
myself.
When I'm
really
sad about something I go to sleep to get away from it. But sleep
never lasts long. And 5 seconds after waking up I snap back into
reality and all the pain comes flooding back to me. The fact that
what happened was actually real hits me. I can't go back to
sleep, and it feels
terrible.