Dear Boy,
Theres
something you should know.. I can't stop thinking about you. I know
it's been six months since the breakup. And baby, those six months
have killed me. Remember how I used to be? Well, in case you've
forgotten.. I used to laugh. I used to smile. I was full of energy.
And I never let anything bring me down for long. I didn't have any
worries. No regrets. Happy all the time. Don't you see how all of
that's changed? I haven't laughed in days. All my smiles are fake.
I feel so worthless and lazy. I've been depressed for months now. I
worry about you.. And as for regrets and happiness, don't even get
me started. I know you must have noticed the change. But did you
ever stop and think that maybe you were the reason for it all.
Because you are. I know I deserve better. I know I deserve to have
the "perfect boyfriend." But that's not what I want. All
I want.. Is you. I know I must sound crazy. Maybe I am. But if
that's the truth.. Then know that I'm only crazy about you. Your
the only one that can save me from myself. But baby, you broke me
the first time.. How do I know you won't do it again? I hope that
you wouldn't.. But somehow, I know you would. You're a player,
baby. But love isn't a game. And I know you don't love me anyway.
But that hasn't stopped me from wishing for you on 11:11 each night
for the past six months. Or thinking about you every single night
before I fall asleep. You're killing me, boy. Slowly but surely.
And if someday this gets out of hand, and I decide to resort to
drastic measures. Just know this one last thing.. I'd carve your
name into the bullet, baby. So they know that you were the last
thing to go through my mind. Don't make me do it baby. Oh please,
don't make me do it.
Love, me.