Kat0001

As soon as October ends,
I am in a Christmas mood. I don't care if it's only November 3rd, it's Christmas okay.

 

i cant do it anymore.
i cant, i dont want to.
relapse is just a reach away.

So, yesterday was my "friend" Clara's brithday, today is Brennas, and mine is tomorrow (Sunday) and so guess what happened?

1. Everyone wished Clara happy brithday becasue it was on the announcements and stuff
2. Brennas friends decorated her locker this happy birthday streamers and happy birthday ballons in her locker
3. Last year my 'best friend' made me decorate some other random girls locker for her birthday, but she never did it for mine. 
4. No one even cared about my birthday because mines on a weekend and no one did anything to my locker for everyone to see
5. Obvioulsy no one cares about me

So, this is why I came back to Witty after not being on it for weeks. I obviousy have friends who don't care about me, and why hang out with them then?

Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be happy with myself. I worry that if I can't be happy with myself, then nobody will ever be happy with me, and that just makes me even more paranoid. It's a cycle, insecurity, unconfidence, and difference. it's all a cycle and it's destorying me.