Bec*

Status: Baby I'm yours. (This layout has been edited)
Joined: September 9, 2011
Last Seen: 7 years
user id: 217069
Gender: F
 © 

I like Greys Anatomy, cuddles. The Fast and Furious and bands.
I cry all the time over Paul Walkers tribute video.
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Quotes by Bec*

Oh if only i knew back then what i know now
the heart aches and pains of love would never exist
my love would be as pure as the sunlight
my words would have no bounds
my body would be free

yet, you see, there is someone holding me back,
back from everything and everyone
someone that wont let me be free.
someone is there holding onto my love and life
telling me that it isn't time. 

not yet, anyway. 

 
i try to make you happy i really do
but with all of your ideas about happiness
i don't know what to do.

i can't pretend that i'm happy when i'm not
but i can't stop loving you.

i haven't seen you in months but your touch 
still lingers on my skin
how do i express my feelings from within?

where did you go, you've seemed to vanish 
it's like you've dissipated into thin air like a whisp of my hair

your eyes fall to the floor and your body lays limp
at my feet.

darling i'm so sorry.all i can do is weep. 
 





















 
                           
I can't remember the last time i looked into your eyes. it feels like an eternity. i think about you all the time and for some reason i can't stop. it's like a tide that keeps coming back to the shore, only to be sent off again. the thing is i can't always be there when you want me to. i can't keep loving you, it's keeping me on my toes and staring at the ceiling at night. soon enough i'm going to collapse from my lack of sleep. i don't know how to keep going without you though. i should not be thinking about you that much, yet here i am, saying your name over and over in my head. why won't i forget you? where does the time go? it's been so long already, and here i am still swooning at the thought of your name. you can't keep looking at me like you do. you can't keep coming into my life when you want to, then dissipating when you feel like it. just keep me alive, keep your eyes open, look at me and breathe. keep me within your grip, and take me when you want me. i want you darling, ain't it obvious? just look at me. look at me and tell me that everything is going to be alright. because right now, i'm losing sleep and losing my mind.

and all i can do is wish for you. 


 

i see the world from below my feet and ask myself why i am so small. i look upon the skies and wonder why i could never be as tall. there, i saw that it wouldn't take just one, but many to create a life. a life is when you savour the moments as your car windows are down, your hair whipping in front of your face, your music blaring. life is when you're interrupted by a force of nature that sweeps you off of your feet and sets you back down in a foreign land. life is when you're laying on your deathbed, laughing and smiling from all the memories you made. that is when you know you have fufilled lifes purpose. 

Love is a strange word. iT CONSISTS OF FOUR LETTERS, YET NONE OF THOSE FOUR LETTERS COULD EXPLAIN THE WAY ONE FEELS ABOUT ANOTHER. LOVE DOESN'T SIMPLY TAKE FORM OF A WORD OR A SOUND, BUT IT ENGULFS YOUR SOUL, IT LEAVES YOU BREATHLESS, IT TAKES AWAY THE WHEELS ON YOUR CAR. YOU CAN'T STOP ONCE IT'S STARTED, AND ONCE YOU'VE STARTED, YOU'RE GOING TO SEE IT THROUGH. I DON'T KNOW WHEN OR WHERE ONE MAY FALL IN LOVE, IT MAY BE ON THE BUS WHEN YOU'RE READING YOUR FAVORITE BOOK. IT COULD BE WHEN YOU'RE WAITING IN LINE AT THE COFFEE SHOP. SOMEONE COULD BUMP INTO YOU ON THEIR WAY TO WORK, YOUR EYES INTERLOCK AND THEN TAKE A COUPLE SECONDS TO STARE AND SMILE. BUT SOMETIMES, THINGS DON'T HAPPEN LIKE THIS. IT MAY BE THAT YOU ONCE HATED SOMEONE THEN, YOU GREW TO LOVE THEM. IT COULD BE THE FACT THAT YOUR BEST FRIENDS BROTHER SOMETIMES SMILES AT YOU WHEN YOU GO OVER THEIR HOUSE. IT MAY BE WHEN YOU TALK TO SOMEONE ONLINE. NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW, AND EVERY TALE OF LOVE WILL ALWAYS BE DIFFERENT. YET HERE I SIT, LOOKING AT THIS SCREEN, AND WONDERING WHEN I WILL HAVE A LOVE LIKE THAT. I WONDER WHEN I WILL FALL IN LOVE, MEET THE PERSON THAT I WILL SHAPE MY LIFE AROUND, THE ONE THAT I WILL LEAN ON, THE ONE THAT WILL KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT ME EVEN WHO MY FIRST CRUSH WAS. BUT FOR NOW, ALL WE CAN DO IS SIT AND WAIT. BECAUSE ONE DAY, SOMETHING MAGICAL WILL HAPPEN, AND YOU'LL THANK THE WORDS OF THE PERSON WHO TOLD YOU TO BE PAITENT.
 

the thing that i think about the most is the way that your lips curve into a smile. The way that you greet me in the mornings. The way we look at each other, but we never speak of it. I love the silence when we listen to each others music, not saying a word, just listening to the thoughts that one can't say aloud. I love the fact that i love you. i can't stand the fact that i'm not the one to give you good morning texts and goodnight texts. It saddens me because i CAN'T be there to hold your hand when you're sad. It all seems too surreal, like i'm living in a daydream. i SEE YOUR FACE AND I FEEL LIKE I AM SEEING A GOD. I FEEL LIKE YOU'RE GOING TO DISSAPATE AS SOON AS I TRY TO TOUCH YOU. I WANT TO SHOW YOU THE WORLD, TAKE YOUR HAND AND RUN ALONG THE BEACH UNTIL WE COLLAPSE ON THE SAND WITH THE SUN IN OUR EYES AND OUR LUNGS BURNING. I WASN'T THE ONE THAT KISSED YOU FIRST, I WASN'T THE ONE TO HUG YOU FIRST. HOW DARE I THINK LIKE THIS, I THINK THAT PEOPLE WILL FALL INTO ME, I WILL MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER, I WILL FIX THEM, THEN I WILL REMAIN BROKEN ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR, WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO PICK ME UP AND GLUE ME BACK TOGETHER. WHERE IS THE LIE? I SIT AND SIT, LOOKING AT OTHERS THAT LOVE AND LAUGH, I REMAIN QUIET IN MY OWN COMPANY, AND ENJOY THE VIEW FROM HERE. EVEN THOUGH I DON'T GET TO BE WITH YOU, I CAN STILL SIT HERE AND ENJOY BEING WITH YOU, LOOK AT YOU. I WON'T EVER BE ABLE TO HAVE A CHANCE WITH YOU, BUT WHO SAID I COULDN'T DREAM ABOUT IT? 

You remind me of the sunsets i witness. always different and beautiful. mesmerizing and captivating as if we were opening our eyes to the world for the first time. you're unique like every sunset is, for its sheer beauty is nothing in comparison with you. the stars that fill the sky seem to buzz with life, like you, when you smile. your simple, yet so complex structure makes me feel like a scientist, exploring a chemicals properties for the first time. i want to look inside your soul, and add coal to your already blazing fire. never did i ever want to see you become someone with red, swolen eyes. you paint a picture better than the mona lisa and brighter than the sun. your skin so ageless and your mind ruthless. you blaze a path that leads to my heart, showing me that love is within. you have shown me the world from your versatile and exquisite mind. never has the world looked so good. you hold your heart in your hands so steady, feeling the muscle contract and expand with every pump, you look at it like you have found the worlds mysteries. you are something of fairytales, something a woman would never dare to dream up. not without consulting her doctor beforehand. yet, there you lay. your legs sprawled out upon the grass, handfulls of it in your hands. your jeans brown with dirt and your eyes glistening. your mouth, moving whispering what sound like symphonies in my ears. and my heart. my heary just smiles.

 

The thing with people is that they will wait and wait  forever.
They will lay in their own vomit and cry themselves to sleep if that means that they can try and get a good nights sleep.
But when the one that they wanted abandoned them in the middle of the night.
Leaving, gathering their stuff in silence and walking out the door.
Who would have it worse of? The one leaving or the one waking up alone?
And who is the one to blame for the heartache?
Is this what the authors were going on about? 
If so, leave me out. Leave me hanging like an abandoned mistletoe. 
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