MaxieTofu

Status: Broken..
Joined: November 2, 2011
Last Seen: 4 days
user id: 233499
Location: Australia
Gender: F
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27 
Pansexual 
Vegan 
Gamer 
Dancer 
Car Enthusiast.

Make no mistake, music and animals are the only reason I am still around.

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MaxieTofu's Favorite Quotes

It has a name, the thing that has ruined my life for years. Its called borderline personality disorder and it explains so much. Ive never been more releaved or scared
I'm sick of being alone  
i must have said sorry a hundred times.
i'm sorry for burdening you this much.
you won't have to put up with it much longer.
we joke around a lot and you forgave me each time.

i don't think i can forgive myself.
i don't think i can make it up to you.

just no more mistakes.
and no more second chances.

it really begs the question:
who did i think i was?
no. really, who?


surely you've forgotten but i cross this bridge each day. to remind myself i'm good. i worry i've become the antagonist. i keep crossing this bridge, it makes me sadder. more cold. i cross it and remember how hurt i was. crushed under confused yet precise rubber boots. golden child gifting me a fresh pink scar and a day off from school. i watch the current and think in silence for a few hours. salt in the wound as more tears flow. how sad and alone. what excuse would i present with tomorrow? i stifled whimpers back in bed. "i can take you to school right now if you want." awkward and out of place. sat across with a dumb look on your face. i keep crossing this bridge. pillow still soaked for the same old and new reasons. it's how i justify my actions. you were cruel. so i can at least be cold back.

 





there is a light that never goes out


 



I feel like I'm losing myself and my mind, more and more

Just let me be numb. I want this to be over. The darnkness can win again, I'm tired and done with this life. 

 





Don't say you still love me, 'cause I might just believe you.

I don't need another reason to stay, your voice brought me home, now I feel so left out in the cold. Is this still real? 

 





You ever read something that makes you feel like your heart just got ripped out of your chest, but have to play it off like you're completely fine and happy? 
 





You lied just like everyone else, and now I'm left trying to figure out if I bother fixing it and picking up the pieces like I always do.

I'm never enough, and I'm always second best. Just once, I'd like someone to fight for me and do what's best for me, but I guess that's too much, hey?