MyMayday

Status:
Joined: April 26, 2012
Last Seen: 1 decade
user id: 295280
Hello, Beautiful!
So, I'm not exactly the best at these whole "about me things" and such; but, I'll try. I'm a 16 year old girl from the USA. I'm a very shy person. You have to get to know me before I'll open up to you. I have trust issues. I'm not quick to be very trusting, and if you lose my trust, good luck earning it back. I love to sing, draw, act, read, write poetry, play instruments, listen to music, and waste my life away online. I'm here for you if you ever need to talk. I won't judge you because I understand the feeling of being judged and I hate it. Feel free to comment and I'll try to get back to you. Also, a follow for a follow? Thanks!








































She lives in a fairytale
somewhere too far for us to find. ♥

Quotes by MyMayday

People who mind don't matter.
People who matter don't mind.
I always mess things up.
I'm about to break.
My thoughts have become
much more than I can take.
I said I'd stay strong;
I didn't ever say
just exactly how long.
I'm breaking inside;
I've had it with life,
Shown by the scars I hide.
I want to give up.
I'm about to quit.
I'm never good enough.
What am I quitting?
Well I will tell you;
I'm quitting everything.
Life it seems will fade away
Drifting further every day
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters no one else
I have lost the will to live
Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free

(lyrics from "Fade to Black" by Metallica)
If weakness is a wound that no one wants to speak of then "cool" is just how far we have to fall. I am not immune, I only want to be loved, but I feel safe behind the firewall.

Can I lose my need impress?
If you want the truth, I need to confess; I'm not alright, I'm broken inside.
I'm worthless, helpless, hopeless, tired, and done.
Why can't goodbye be easier to say?
I always seem to be happy in pictures or when being around others... but inside all I want to do is break down... and I'm not myself when I'm alone.
Sorry for my multiple vent quotes lately... ignore them if you want.

I’m so sick and tired of living. Sick and tired of breathing. Sick and tired of crying alone in my room. Sick and tired of pretending I’m ok. Sick and tired of smiling when all I want to do is break down and cry. Sick and tired of being tired in the morning because I couldn’t sleep at night due to thinking about things. Sick and tired of being told “just be happy.” Sick and tired of people trying to talk me out of things. Sick and tired of cutting… It’s an addiction and all… But it doesn’t fix anything. Nothing will. I’ve been to counseling but it doesn’t help. Nothing does, and nothing will. There’s only one solution left. I don’t want to kill myself… But I see no other way out. I know I’d hurt the few people who do love me… But they’d get over it eventually. There isn’t a day I go without thinking about suicide. Pondering who would actually care. Thinking about ways to do it. Trying to figure out the most pain free way. I don’t see a future for myself. When I say that, I don’t mean that I don’t know what I want to do when I get older… I mean that I honesty cannot picture myself in the future. I want to learn to say goodbye.
The more you care, the more it hurts. The more I realize I could probably never go through with it because it would hurt the few people who do care. It's all so frustrating. I don't want to do this anymore. I've sort of given up on cutting. I still do a little... but I've realized that it won't fix anything... nothing will. I feel hopeless, helpless, ashamed, and tired. Just tired of everything.