Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this; You come home from school one
day. You've had yet another horrible day. You're just ready to
give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out
that suicide note you've written and rewritten over and over and
over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last
time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying
down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for
the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks
on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don't answer, so
he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks
you're asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room
to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper
in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up.
She's screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go
tell Dad that "Mommy is crying and sissy won't wake up." Your dad
runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the
letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits
him, what's going on, and he screams. He screams and throws
something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts
to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding
each other, crying. The next day at school, there's an
announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It
takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone
goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they
were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all
the things they've said to you. That boy that used to tease you
and call you names, he can't help but hate himself for never
telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex boyfriend, the
one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He
can't handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out
of the school. Your friends? They're sobbing too, wondering how
they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could
have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend?
She's in shock. She can't believe it. She knew what you were
going through, but she never thought it would get that bad... Bad
enough for you to end it. She can't cry, she can't feel anything.
She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the
floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It's a few
days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew
you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The
one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots
of people talk about all the good memories they had with you,
there were a lot. Everyone's crying, your little brother still
doesn't know you killed yourself, he's too young. Your parents
just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister,
you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend,
she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they
start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it.
She cries and cries and doesn't stop for days. It's two years
later. The whole school talks to a counselor/therapist at least
once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls
have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts
himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn't know how to love anymore and
just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into
depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She
didn't succeed like you did, but she tried...your brother? He
finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he
cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up
to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your
dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your
mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.
People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices
don't just effect you. They effect everyone. Don't end your life,
you have so much to live for. Things can't get better if you give
up. I'm here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter
who you are. Even if we've NEVER talked before, i'm here for you.