long, but worth
the read...
A
Daddy's Letter to His Little Girl
(about her future husband)
Dear Cutie-Pie,
Recently, your mother and I were searching for an answer on
Google. Halfway through entering the question, Google returned
a list of the most popular searches in the world. Perched at
the top of the list was “How to keep him
interested.”
It startled me. I scanned several of the countless articles
about how to be sexy and sexual, when to bring him a beer
versus a sandwich, and the ways to make him feel smart and
superior.
And I got angry.
Little One, it is not, has never
been, and never will be your job to
“keep him interested.”
Little One, your only task is to know deeply in your
soul—in that unshakeable place that isn’t rattled
by rejection and loss and ego—that you are
worthy of interest. (If you can remember that everyone
else is worthy of interest also, the battle of your
life will be mostly won. But that is a letter for another
day.)
If you can trust your worth in this way, you will be attractive
in the most important sense of the word: you will attract a boy
who is both capable of interest and who wants to spend
his one life investing all of his interest in you.
Little One, I want to tell you about the boy who
doesn’t need to be kept interested, because he knows you
are interesting:
I don’t care if he puts his elbows on the dinner
table—as long as he puts his eyes on the way your nose
scrunches when you smile. And then can’t stop
looking.
I don’t care if he can’t play a bit of golf with
me—as long as he can play with the children you give him
and revel in all the glorious and frustrating ways they are
just like you.
I don’t care if he doesn’t follow his
wallet—as long as he follows his heart and it
always leads him back to you.
I don’t care if he is strong—as long as he gives
you the space to exercise the strength that is in your
heart.
I couldn’t care less how he votes—as long as he
wakes up every morning and daily elects you to a place of honor
in your home and a place of reverence in his
heart.
I don’t care about the color of his skin—as long as
he paints the canvas of your lives with brushstrokes of
patience, and sacrifice, and vulnerability, and tenderness.
I don’t care if he was raised in this religion
or that religion or no religion—as long
as he was raised to value the sacred and to know every moment
of life, and every moment of life with you, is deeply
sacred.
In the end, Little One, if you stumble across a man like that
and he and I have nothing else in common, we will have the most
important thing in common:
You.
Because in the end, Little One, the only thing you
should have to do to “keep him interested” is to be
you.
Your eternally interested guy,
Daddy