Taz98

I wanna make a painting where I write out people's secrets but rite some in a diffrent color so when I'm done you'll see the words dirty little secrets like the song, its completely anomyus and if you don't want to put your secret on here you can email me tschofell@gmail.com

it kills me seeing how hurt you are. i hate knowing that i cant help. i hate that i have to check you witty to see if you ok because you wont tell me when you not. i hate that weve drifted apart. i hate not talking to you all the time.
i miss the i love you's. i miss the goodnight beautifuls. i miss when no matter what we were always there for each other. i miss always going to eachother when something was wrong. 
rember planing out our summer? rember when you said you like me? rember when we were trying to convince each other that we wanted to go to whatever college so we could be with eachother? rember when you called me your best friened? rember when you were trying to stop cutting for me? rember when you were gonna start eating for me? 
what happened to all of that? 
im never happy anymore. im always thinking about you. i miss you. i started cutting again. i think about suicide more. i eat less. i always tried to be better for you. i always thought, and still do, that maybe if im better, youd like me more. i feel like its my fault. i never shoulda asked you out. it was stupid. you can do way better. i hate myself for ruining all of that. im getting worse and worse everyday. every cut, why does it matter if you dont care anymore? every skipped meal, why does it matter if you dont care anymore? nothing matters if i dont matter to you. you mean the world to me. ive tried to get over you but i cant. your over me. why cant i get over you? all this probly sounds stupid but its true. i just wish none of this ever happend. sometimes i wish we never met. i wouldnt be so upset right now. but i dont know if i could live without you. but then again, i guess im not really living with you either....

maybe i should just kill myself. no one would miss me...

rember when you were sick and you wanted me to stay home from school so we could talk? 
rember when you told me you liked me? 
rember when you said youd date me? 
rember when i dumped my boyfriend for you? rember when you rejected me? do you? rember leading me on thinking youd say yes? rember that message? i dont want to ruin things :/? rember that? that killed me. i dont know if you care but it killed me and it still does. its like im slowly dieing. you never want to talk to anymore because i guessi flirt to much or whatever but you lead me on, the one merson i thought would never hur me did. i should probly be mad but for some reason it just makes me want you more. whatever that reason is i wish i could get rid of it. i wish i could walk away as easy as you did. i wish i culd just be ok...

i really dont know what i did, but, im sorry. im sorry for everything. i was trying to help. i just wanted you to not cut, cuz everytime you tell me you cut a little bit of me dies, i wanted you to eat cuz everyday that you didnt eat killed just a it more. i guess i cared to much, maybe not enough, but i never thought youd get mad at me for it. i hate knowing that how i feel, you dont feel the same but i can deal with that, but i cant deal with us not talking, everytime we talk it being incedibly akward, knowing you probly dont want to talk to me your just being nice. im really sorry for what i did but, i need you back.

how can you walk away so easily while im still crying my eyes out?

it still kills me that i cant be with you

im still not to sure what i did but im sorry. i was only trying to help you. i guess i never was what you wanted, but i hope someday ill be good enough...

you really dont get it do you? 
im completly, totaly, 100%, fully, truely  
in love with you

30 day challeng
day five
the saddest moment in your life
well ive had alot of sad moments but my top 5 worst are (in no order)
- papa dieing
-my girlfriend commiting suicide
 -looseing three best friends in 3 months 
-her saying no when i asked her out
-my best friend commiting suicide