ThatAlexGuy

Jesus Christ completely changed my life for the better.
Before I knew Him, I always felt empty even when I had plenty of reasons to be happy.
But then I decided to put all of my faith and trust into Him, and that's the best decision I've ever made.
He healed me when I felt completely broken, and He helped me to finally find the peace and joy I had always wanted.
There is nothing in the universe that can compare to the love and grace of my Lord and Savior.
Thank You God!

I don't want to keep pretending that I'm happy.

I'm just so sick of constantly feeling this way and not knowing what to do about it...

As of today, I'm 17.
And I've never been in a relationship.
Or kissed a girl on the lips.
Or even held hands with a girl.
Or even hugged any girl I've had a crush on.
Sad, I know...

Today at school, in my English class, we did these things called "six-word memoirs."
Basically, you use only six words to make a sentence that greatly relates to your personal life.
You know what mine was?
"What does a relationship feel like?"

I'm just not in the mood to talk to anyone at all right now.

Keep in mind that the look on someone's face can sometimes be the complete opposite of what they're really feeling.

Today, I'm gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
'Cause we don't have long, gonna make the most of it
Today, I'm gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late

So, today at my school, we went to the computer lab in English class to update these career plan things that we
have to do every year since our school is a vocational school. Then they showed us this website that focuses on helping you find career choices based on what you like doing, and college choices where you can pursue those careers. They also have some tests you can take to figure things out about yourself. One of them is a "personality type" test. I took it, and I got this:

  "People like you are quiet, gentle, and caring. When people first meet you you may seem reserved and cool. But once you get to know and care about someone, you are warm and very loyal. You tend to be cautious about jumping into social activities and may resist trying new experiences. Instead, you like spending time with one or two close, trusted friends or spending time alone, enjoying the things that really interest you. You are considerate, respectful, and sensitive, and usually find tension or conflict between people very uncomfortable. Since you have strong beliefs about right and wrong and try to always treat other people kindly, you may be easily hurt or offended by the insensitivity or callousness of others.

You are also unpretentious and down-to-earth. You speak clearly and literally, and want others to be equally explicit in explaining directions or stating their expectations of you. You tend to be selective about things like food and clothing, are usually tidy and organized, and prefer to be dressed appropriately for all occasions. You're also careful with your money and possessions. You are probably blessed with an excellent memory for details, especially facts about people, but may find it hard to read between the lines or deal with a lot of abstractions. Since you like to make a decision and stick with it, you are often annoyed when plans are changed suddenly. You're not a big risk taker and are happiest with a predictable daily routine. While you want to please the people close to you, you are rarely willing to compromise on really important issues."

The first paragraph is completely true. The second paragraph is only wrong about the risk taking, because I do take risks a lot. Other than that, this describes me almost perfectly.

I couldn't even come up with a word earlier to explain how I felt.
Now I figured out the perfect word.
I feel devastated.