me: *doesn't
party*
me: *doesn't
drink*
me: *doesn't sleep
around*
me: *doesn't get knocked
up*
me: *stays up past 1am; maybe
goes downstairs to make a sandwich or something*
parents: WHAT'S WRONG WITH
YOU WHY ARE YOU UP SO LATE DID WE TEACH YOU NOTHING WHERE DID WE
GO WRONG YOU'VE WOKEN UP THE WHOLE HOUSE YOU HIDEOUS DEVIL
CHILD YOU'RE DESTROYING THIS FAMILY