The Basics:
Name: Evelina.
Age: 13.
Love Life:
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: had.
Do you like someone?: yes alot.
Does anyone like you?: yes he does.
Hugged anyone in the past week?: yeah.
Friendships
Who is your best friend?: luisa.
Where did you meet them?: neighbor.
Did you lose any friends this year?: mhm.
Gain any?: Yeah.
Meet a special friend?: yes.
Did you hang out with any friends in the past week?: Yes.
New Years Eve
Did you do anything at midnight? Yeah.
Who did you spend it with?: My Family.
Did you have any resolutions?: yeah.
Valentines Day
Did you have a Valentine?:
Kristopher Allen Wentzell. <3 for the first time.
Did you send out any cards/chocolates/etc?: friends.
Did you have a boyfriend/girlfriend on this day?: yes i did.
Summer
Did you go on vacation?:no.
Did you hang out on the beach with friends?: no.
How long was your summer break?: like 3 months.
Did you get a tan?: Eh.
Did you have a boyfriend/girlfriend during the summer?: Nope.
Halloween
Did you go trick or treating?: nope.
If so, who did you go with?: no one.
Did you dress up?: nope.
Was it fun?: didnt goo.
Your Birthday
Who did you spend it with?: Friends & Family.
What did you do?: dinner.
What did you get?: money and phone.
Have You Ever: (Yes or No)
Hugged someone: Yes.
Electricuted yourself: yes.
Climbed more than 60 feet: No
Made a Youtube video: Yes
Lied to a loved one: yes.
Had a pet: Yes
Ran a marathon: No
5 Do’s
1. Do you play any instruments?: No.
2. Do you play any sports?: track and field!
3. Do you believe in 2012? Noo!
4. Do you like animals? Yeah.
5. Do you honestly like Obama?: Yeahh sure.
4 If’s
1. If you get $1 Million for breaking up with your
boyfriend/girlfriend, would you?: well if i was already planning
on it, yes. if not, then no.
2. If you were to get $50,000 for killing a rat, would you?:
yes.
3. If you were to choose between your best friend and your
brother/sister, who would you choose?: prolly bestfriend cuz me
and my brother arent close.
4. If you were to choose between coke/pepsi or sprite/7up, which
would you choose?: pepsi and 7up.
3 How’s
1. How old do you want to be when you get married?: 20 or
21.
2. How many siblings do you have?: 1.
3. How did your last Christmas go? good.
2 When’s
1. When is your birthday?: October 20th.
2. When was the last time you went to the mall?: while ago.
1 What
1. What would you say if the guy/girl you like right now kissed
you?: i wouldnt say anything. i'd kiss him back like ive never
kissed him before.
Thirty-two secrets. Be honest no matter
what.
One - Where was your default pic
taken? baby shower.
Two - Are you being honest? yeah.
Three - Have you ever lost a close
friend? Yeah.
Four - What is your current
mood? mixed.
Five- Whats your brothers name? that does
not matter.
Six - Where do you wish you were right
now? shoppppping.
Seven - Have a crazy side? helllll yes.
Eight - Ever had a near death
experience? Yes.
Nine - Something you do a lot? tumbleeeee.
Ten - Angry at anyone? Kind of.
Eleven - What's the last thing you said to your
mom? i do not remember.
Twelve - When was the last time you cried? last
night.
Thirteen - Is there anyone you would do anything
for? Yeah..
Fourteen - What do you think about when you are falling
asleep? him.
Fifteen-Do you still have pictures of an ex
boyfriend/girlfriend? yes.
Sixteen- What was the last thing in your
mouth? gum.
Seventeen- Who was the last person you talked to on the
phone? kris.
Eighteen- What is your favorite song? You
Make Me Feel.
Nineteen- What are you doing right
now? this.
Twenty - Where did you get the top you are
wearing? white aero long sleeved.
Twenty-one- Do you enjoy drama? Nah.
Twenty two- Describe your life in three
words? pretty f^ucked up.
Twenty three- Who are you thinking of right now?
kristopher. <3
Twenty four- What should you be doing right
now? Nothing.
Twenty five- What are you listening
to? food cooking.
Twenty-six- Does it annoy you when PEOPlEzz TAlk likE
THiS? Yeah.
Twenty seven- Who was the last person who yelled at
you? mom.
Twenty eight - Why were you last sad? we broke
up.
Twenty nine- Do you use smiley faces on the
computer? Yeaah.
Thirty-Have you ever changed clothes in a
vehicle? Yeah.
Thirty one- Are you happy with life right
now? not quite.
Thirty two- Is there anybody you're really disappointed
in right now? Yeah.
Format by PaperLung
You’re sitting in your room ~ door locked ~ with a pen in your hand and a blank piece of paper in front of you. Your hand is shaking, and the tears begin again - for the third time in the past hour. ‘To my family’ you write at the top of the page, but decide it’s a bad way to begin your letter ~ your suicide letter. You try again, start over ~ again and again, but you don’t know where to begin. No one understands you; no one knows what you’re going through, you’re alone or at least that’s what you think. Nobody would care if you’re alive or not, you mean nothing to nobody. It’s night, and you slip into bed. ’Goodbye’ you whisper into the darkness. And with that, you take your last breathe and end it all. No body cares, right? Well you thought wrong. It’s a Tuesday the following morning, and when it’s 7:21, your mother comes and knocks on your door. She doesn't know you can’t hear her she doesn't know you’re gone. She knocks a few more times, calling your name to open up. When there is no reply from your side of the door, she opens it and screams. She collapses on the ground while your dad rushes to your room. Your siblings have already left for school. Your very weak mother collects all the energy she’s got which is close to nothing to walk over to your bed. She leans over your dead body, crying, squeezing your hand, screaming. Your dad is trying to stay strong, but the tears escape his eyes; calling 000 or 911 with his left hand while his other one is on your mother’s back. Your mother blames herself. All those times she had said ‘no’ to you, all those times she had screamed at you, and sent you to your room over something stupid. Your father will blame himself for not being there for you when you asked for help, for being away from home at work for long. Nobody cares, right? 8:34. There’s a knock on your classroom door it’s the school principle. She looks more worried than ever. She calls the teacher to the side; all the students worried: what’s going on? The principle then later announces about your suicide. The popular girl that always called you fat and ugly is now blaming herself. The kid that would always copy your homework but treat you like crap ~ he’s blaming himself. The boy that sits behind you ~ the one that always threw things at you during class ~ he’s blaming himself too. The teacher is blaming herself - for all those times she’d scream at you for forgetting your homework, or not listening in class. People are crying, screaming, shocked, in regret of what they did. They’ll all be devastated - even the kids you’ve never talked to before. Still nobody cares about you, right? Your siblings get home. Your mother has to tell them that you’re gone; forever. Your little sister ~ no matter how many times she’s screamed at you, told you she hated you and stole your stuff ~ always loved you, and saw you as her hero; her role model. She now starts to blame herself; why didn’t I do what she told me to do when she told me to? Why did I take her stuff even when she asked me not to? This is all my fault. Your brother gets home ~ the boy that never cries. He’s now in his room; mad at himself ~ he caused your death. All those times he’d played pranks on you. He’s punching holes in his wall, turning over things; he doesn’t know how to deal with the fact that you’re gone. Forever. Nobody cares about you, right? Right? It has been over a month. The door to your room has been closed all this time. Everything is different now. Your brother has to be sent to anger management classes, your little sister cries everyday still waiting for you to come back. Everyday she waits for you to come back home. The popular girls have now turned anorexic. They don’t know how to deal with the pain that they’re feeling. Your father has depression; your mother hasn’t slept for nights it’s all her fault. She’s been crying and screaming every night wishing for you to come back. The boy who would always bother you dropped out of school. The boy that copied your homework now cuts. But nobody cares about you, aren’t I right? Your mother finally decides to go clean out your room. But she can’t do it. She’s locked herself in your room for two days to try to clean up your clothes, your things. But she can’t she can’t say goodbye to you, not yet, not now. Never. It’s your funeral. It’s a big one ~ everybody comes. No one knows what to say. The beautiful girl with the big smile is gone; you’re somewhere else. No one knows what to say, they’re all still shocked. Everyone cries, everyone misses you. They all wish you’d come back but you don’t, and you won’t. Still think nobody cares about you? Think again. Even if people don’t show it, they care about you, they love you. If you kill yourself today or any other day you won’t know just how much you meant to people. If you kill yourself today, it stops your pain, but it pains all the ones who know you for the rest of their life. Suicide is the easy way out - but it’s the wrong choice. Life is beautiful. Yes, it does have its ups and downs everyone has their bad days. Sometimes people go through tough times in their lives like you’re probably going through now but bad times come and go. You might not see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it’s there. No matter how hard life gets, never give up on yourself, or on your life. Take a minute now, and think. If you killed yourself ~ how would the people that love you feel/go through? Can’t think of anything? Well I’ll tell you: tears, tears, and more tears. Devastation. Guilt. Pain. Broken. Regret. Miserable. If after reading this you still feel suicidal, there are people that can help you. I’m here for you whenever you need me, and I’ll be more than happy to listen to you and try to help you feel better. There are teachers, parents, grandparents, neighbors, adults, councilors ~ they’re all there for you whenever you need them.
nmq