Damaged
Part 5
That day they gave me my journal. I think
that journal was the best friend I have ever had. Everyone before
that hurt me at least once. But not my journal, my journal was the
one thing that gave me hope. It gave me somewhere to write my
feelings. To this day I still use a journal. I like writing my
feelings down and then let people read, it’s so much easier
then saying the words. Lucas was the best friend I had there. He
always read my journal. He always made me feel better. I knew I was
heading down the wrong path, I cut, and I wanted to die. I went
online and met guys...i whored myself out. I had a boyfriend at the
time. His name was Phillip he didn’t mean anything to me. He
thought I was hot, I liked the attention. That day my roommate
Jackie left. It was odd I didn’t know what I was going to do.
We got really close; after all we did stay up talking about life
half the time. We spent time in class and then time in therapy. I
still never told anyone about why I was really so depressed. People
didn’t really ask, so why tell? They believed what I told
them, what I told them was true. But time and time I didn’t
tell them the whole truth. The next day I was finally allowed to
leave the room. I went down for breakfast, I didn’t eat that
much. They also didn’t know I was anorexic and bulimic.
I’ve dealt with my weight since I could remember. I always
felt so fat. I still do. Sometimes there are days when I
won’t eat anything and there are days when I throw up what I
do eat. People say “she can’t have an eating disorder,
she’s fat”. When we were done eating we walked back
upstairs we had some time to just hang out together. That’s
when we saw two new girls walk in. later to find out that their
names were Taylor and Brittany.
A/N Hey guys sorry it took me so long to
post again, this story is hard to write because its my life story,
but anyways I changed the way im writing it, tell me what you
think