bentleysmommy

Status: <<< This kid in this picture is my life!! <333
Joined: February 26, 2013
Last Seen: 1 decade
Birthday: April 18
user id: 351483
Gender: F
Heey guys!! Im baaack!! Ive missed you all soo much. For those of you that may not know me, well.. My name is Kendraa. I have a beautiful son named Bentley Axyvior. He is my whole world!! Ive spent 4 months in Rehab. I just got my son back right before Christmas. Im almost 18 years old. I also have another little boy. He was a twin to Bentley. His name was Aydenn Nikolos, he was still born. I never got to hear my little one cry. But hes better off up there in heaven. Anything else you need to know, just ask! Stay Beautiful guys! <3 <3

My kids..

Aydenn- I have two sons. The oldest is Aydenn Nikolos, he was born a minute before Bentley. Sadly he was only is this world not even for a full minute. He died before i even got to meet him, he was not fullly developed all the way. When they were inside of me, Bentley took up most of the room. He was fully developed, which left no room for Aydenn to grow. I do get sad, because he was my son. He was my world. When they brought me his little body, and layed him in my arms, i couldnt help but scream and cry. I never got to see my son cry, open his eyes, move his little limbs. He weighed 3 lbs 2 oz. He is missed dearly. I love him with everything i have. I make atleast 3 trips a week to the cemetary to see my son. I sit there and i cry and i talk and i just vent. I know he hears me. I know hes in no pain up there with our great lord.. <3 <3 <3

Bentley- Bentley was my youngest, he entered this world at 5 lbs 7 oz. He was born a minute after Aydenn. He is healthy. He turned one on 3/24/13. Hes gotten soo big. Hes starting to walk, he can say a few words as of right now. He doesnt talk much, only to the people hes most familiar with. He is my life. It is hard sometimes. I get stressed with school, and work, and everything else. But at night, when i come home to my son and i go to his room and see him sound asleep in his crib, it reminds me that this is all worth it. He needs me and i need him. He is what keeps me going on. <3 <3 <3

I am pregnant again with another child. I just recently found out. It is not with the same man i had my other boys with. Its with my ex boyfriend. And before you start hating on me and calling me a hoe and stuff like that. I didnt plan on this. I didnt plan on Eric breaking up with me after we found out im pregnant. But he did. Thats life I suppose. I raised one kid on my own, and i can raise another. So dont hate on me. Im a perfectly good mother. And ill be darn if my kids dont get raised right. So please, keep the hate to yourself. I really dont need it at the moment...

Quotes by bentleysmommy

Had a great birthday yesterday!!

Hung out with my boy all day long!!

Layed in my bed and watched re-runs of Spongebob and wore our footie pajamas together!!

Hes my life.

I wouldnt wanna spend my 18th birthday with anyone else!!

Mommy loves you Bent!! 

<333
So ive been doing alot of thinking since ive had the miscarriage...

and i think i wanna get my tubes tied. I dont think i should try for anymore children..

I think Bentley is enough. I think it makes sense,

i mean ive had a still born child, and now a miscarriage..


i dont think my body can handle any more of it..

So im considering getting my tubes tied.

Anyone think i shouldnt?




 
Birthday on Thursday?!

Daaarnnn im getting old!!



 
Seriously think my sons bipolar...

one minute hes telling me to shut up cause hes mad at me...

then the next hes as happy as can be shoving french fries in his mouth!

Hahahha. I love you Bentley. <3 (:





 
Took Bentley out to the cemetary today, to see Aydenns head stone that has been redone..

We were sitting there in the grass, and Bentley is pulling up all the grass around us..

Bentley looks at me and says

"Why we here, i wanna go play"

I looked at him and all i could say is,

"Bent, this is where your brother is. Your big brother is here."

He looks at me and says,

"No one here"

I started crying and said,

"Youll understand when your older hunnie, just dont worry about it now. Your still a baby."

Bentley just curled up in my lap and played with his hot wheels until we left.

Aydenn, he may not know you now. But i promise you, he will know about you. He will know that he had a brother that didnt make it into this world. A brother that he never got to meet. A brother that would have been his best friend. <3 <3 <3

I miss you more and more everyday...



 
Missing him more than usual today..

Just wanna hold him..
Just wanna feel him wrap his fingers around my thumb the way his brother does...
Just wanna see him and his brother laying on the floor playing together..
Just want him here with me..

Just wish i could have got to hear my little one cry.
See my little one move..

I love you my beautiful baby boy..

 Mommy would give her life if it meant you could be here and grow up like your brother..

Never gonna forget you..
<3

RIP Aydenn Nikolos
<3 <3






 
Im here to inform you all that have been watching me post my quotes about my pregnancy...

Yesterday while i was at school i had a miscarriage.. I lost my unborn child..

My doctor told me it was from me going off my meds that caused all my stressed which caused the loss of my child..

thank you all for caring about me and my little family..

i greatly apperciate it..










 
<3 Aydenn Nikolos <3

We never had the chance to play, 
to laugh,
to rock,
to wiggle,

We long to hold you, to touch you now..
to listen to you giggle..

Ill always be your mother..
he'll always be your father..

Youll always be our child..

The child that we had, but never met..

RIP baby boy..

Mommy loves you so much..

Ill see you soon..
<3
 
Got my first Ultra Sound tomorrow!!!

VERY EXCITED!!!


:D
Im only almost a month along.

And my belly is already getting big!!

Gonna be one big baby!!

Hopefully not twins again!!

Either way, 

one baby

or two..

i love them with everything i got..

<3 <3 <3