blackbunny

Status:
Joined: February 15, 2015
Last Seen: 9 years
user id: 389702

Quotes by blackbunny

I know you dont wanna believe me but please do... it kills me inside, to think you don't believe its true. You are beautiful in every way, the flaws you see are the beautys i see. I know you dont believe me because i know you dont feel worthy. but please listen to this when i say... you define your worth ,who have you ever let get in your head and tell you otherwise? And now you stand here so concious of your scars ,hideing in your hoodie... and i know why ,sometimes it feels good to be isolated like this isnt happening to me and this is just a movie. ive been there before now look at me. and now im standing here WITH you not beside you telling you. those scars only mean youve truly survived not just an addiction but a battle, a hundred year war. i know what youve gone through i feel this way too but there comes a time to take risks because I say your beauty is beyond all else and i say you are worthy of much more than the air you breathe, you are worthy of a full life and you are worthy of love.
I am both happy and sad .  And I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.
I dont know why i do this to myself
i blame it on my social anxiety but its me
i cant be rude i cant say no
i wish i could but i cant find the words

i am attracted to guys i feel unworthy of
i confront guys i like who i think will except me
i date the bad guys and befriend the good ones
i date guys who dont underatand me
i wish i could be with my friend
he understands me and can feel me
but i am not brAve with him because i am afraid of inconsistencys
if i meet someone in the mood of anger i must stay in anger because otherwize i would be fake
this is my world of social anxiety
I am 15
I lost my identity at 9
I began staying home alone for days at 9
My mother became a drunk when i was 9
my mom cheated on my father when he was deployed & i knew when i was 9
My parents divorced when i was 10
when i was 10 my mom chose her husband over me
when i was 10 the cops tryed to arrest me
I was bullied since 10 at 12 different schools
I began to sneek out at 11
I smoked at 11
I had my inocence taken at 11
I began starveing myself at 11
I got high at 11
I began to self-injure at 12
the cops threatened to arrest me at 12
I began to get drunk at 12
when i was 12 my father was diagnosed with severe PTSD
My father began to hit me at11
when i was 11 the cops threatened to arrest me again
I began to feel ashamed of my existence at 12
I was diagnosed with EDNOS at 13
I was diagnosed with deppression & bipolar disorder at 14
I tryed to recover at 14
I still dont understand why so many bad things happen at 15
I am 15 and i have felt great pain
I am 15 and the pain never ends
But...
I am 15 and i recognize i should feel worthy of happiness.there was a time that i didnt know that. I still dont feel worthy but thats not the point . the point is im getting better. the point is there is more beyond the pain. and i will garentee you wont regret the trail you took to get there. the point is i have hope now. the big difference between pain and happiness is Jesus Christ. choseing him wont assure no pain but it will allow you to persevere.