callmedora

You know what I think
we are most afraid of?
Not knowing.
Not knowing whether it’s all really worth it.
Not knowing if you should give up or keep fighting.
Not knowing why you do things you do.
Not knowing the purpose.

It’s like when you’re little
and you touch the stove and get burned,
because you didn’t really know that it was hot.

Not knowing has always hurt us,
from the very beginning.
 

You know that
moment you feel
 when you wake up
and realize you have more time to sleep?

Or, when you accidentally overhear someone
say something nice about you?

Or when you see someone you like
and your heart races?

Or even when you reach a goal you set for yourself?

Now, remember what that feels like
 and next time you’re upset, or sad, or crying
think about that feeling.
 

If only there could be an
invention that bottled up
a memory.
And it never faded, and it never got stale.
And then, when one wanted it,
the bottle could be uncorked,
and it would be like living the moment
all over again.
                                              
                                        — Rebecca, Daphne du Maurier
 

Have you ever
wondered about the things we tell ourselves
before we fall asleep?

We whisper the words in the dark,
telling ourselves that we’re happy,
or that he’s happy,
that people will change their minds.
We persuade ourselves that we can live
without the people who have left.

Each night before we fall asleep
we lie to ourselves in a desperate hope
that maybe,in the morning,
it will all be true.