09-16-12,
Sunday.
So today I woke up early, like 7
in the morning. I went out with my family and my step-brother
Camilo, who visited us yesterday from another country where he
lives. I haven't seen him in a while, almost 2 years, I
think.
It was fun, to distract my head for a while, we ate at a nice
restaurant, went to visit some places from my city, but...
still, it's difficult to get him out of my head. The worst
part is that I know he never ever thinks about me that
much.
I got back home at like 4 or 5pm, and I start studying for a
test tomorrow for a while. I talked with Matthew occassionally,
I mean he texts me, and then I answer him late, and then he
does too... etc. And I don't know, that's all about
it.
I was thinking about how much times would be spend together
this week. I don't really want to ask him to spend lunch or
something together I will wait for HIM to do that. I don't
know but I always feel like I'm just a waste of time for
him. So yeah, whatever, I will not ask him once, now, let's
see if he asks me.
Anywayyy... At night like 8pm we talked via facebook and we had
a little very little argue. It made me cry anyways... Yeah
I'm really soft and even more when it comes about Matthew.
But we got along really fast and that made me happy.:) I start
to think that swallowing my pain and just shutting up is the
best option so we can go well.
So, We bothered each other kind of like good old days when we
were just best friends, and somehow it made me really happy.
But I obviously still miss ALOT being his only girl... Like
romanticly. But I know I'm kind off special for him,
I'm not just one more of his female friends.
But still I really would like him to notice me more at school,
you know, at least wave at me everytime he sees me, cause, to
talk to me everytime he sees me, that's just ask TOO MUCH.
But either way, That would make me really happy.
I dont know.. I really have a bad feeling for this week.
Hopefully my thoughts are wrong this
time.