I don't
understand
why I do get jealous. I guess it's because I'm just too
afraid to lose you. & I don't like how it's okay that
she can just explode when you say something sarcastic or kind of
rude, but if she says something she gets mad angry because you
get upset in ANY way. Well it bugs the f/uck out of me, sorrrrrry
if that bothers you in any way, shape or form. That's what
you told me this morning, how you don't like that. Well god
damn I don't like it either. I don't like it either,
babe. And about her wanting to go to the movies with you? Oh
HELLLLLL NOOOOO. That's inappropriateon all levels. Sorry
babeee, but it really is. And I guess you can go and hang out
with her whenever the f/uck you want, because, I don't know.
I guess I shouldn't get jealous but I do. What if I went to
hang out by myself with some other guy? Kyle, for examlpe? Hm?
What if I did? Just me and him going somewhere together alone, or
hanging out, just us two? You probably wouldn't care though,
really you don't seem like the jealous type. But listen up
boy, I am, and that's just the way I am. Wit having two
IMMSENSE heartbreaks (one of which sent me despressed for a short
while), and the experiences I've had with one of them
(Michael) I can't really trust other girls around you when
you guys are alone. Also, I get jealous because I just do,
alright? So get the f/uck over it, please.
But like I said. I won't be telling you anymore. One day
I'll ask you what's up, and you'll be like
"chillin with jessica" or "going to hang our with
just jessica." And you know what I'll say? "Oh
that's cool, baby(:" But I won't mean a word of it.
Just saying. I'll just come here to Witty and vent all my
life out, because according to you it's "not fair that I
get jealous and you don't." Well once again?
Sorrrrrrrrrrry. That's who I am. We've established you
don't like this trait of mine. So you know what? It shall be
hidden from you now, boy. For now and for the rest of
forever.
Even right now, I'm thinking about the two of you hanging
out, having a good time and what not. And it makes me sad. ): But
not like you're gonna know. I'll be telling you to go
have fun hanging out and being with her. Crap like that. And
I'll pretend it doesn't even matter to me.
Because the truth is, I'm the best
mother f/ucking actress you've ever seen, when it comes to
hiding what I'm feeling.
** sorry, just a vent. had to get it out.
mq/nmf