I haven't cut since that
day.
Call me weird, but I have my
reason. After my best friend died, & my suicide
attempt, I needed something to help me escape. I started
cutting, stupid, right? My parents had purchased me
Justin Bieber tickets since he had a concert in Atlanta,
and the sound check meet and greet thing. I went with my
friend Tess, and we had car trouble so we got there (The
meet and greet thing) a little late. The sound check was
fun, he was silly, and sweet. Then came the meet &
greet, me and Tess ended up in the back, sadly, and had
to wait, and very long time. When we finally
reached the table, Tess took her picture, and got an
autograph, then she headed to the bathroom. I shook
Justin's hand and told him what an inspiration he was
to me, when he suddenly looked shocked. I was about to
freak out, did I do something wrong? He leaned behind him
& said something to a tall man next to him, before
attacking me with a hug, and whispering. "Don't
ever do that again, please, you're beautiful."
He pulled back, gave me an autograph and a picture.
"Promise?" He asked. I still didn't know
what he was talking about. He noticed my confusion, and
grabbed my arm, and rolled up my jacket sleeve, revealing
my cuts. "Promise you'll stop, for me?" he
asked. "Promise." I hugged him, and met Tess
outside. I haven't cut since.
That day made me realize, that my life is worth living,
& I'm here for a reason.
The week after my best friend
died.
I
wanted to be with him. So, I attempted suicide. I got
already, i was planning on hanging myself. I all I needed and
I headed to the back yard, where we had a tree tall enough.
No one was home, so I thought this was the perfect time. Even
though I felt like something was telling me to 'Stop,
Alex, don't do it, it's not worth it.' I was
still planning on doing it. I was setting it all up, when my
nine year old sister(she's ten now), Marie, walked into
the back yard from a sleepover at her friend'
Emily's. She was shocked as to what I was doing, and
Marie understood very well what it was. She new I was about
to kill myself, so suddenly, she burst into tears, and ran to
me screaming: "Don't do it, please, Alex, it's
not worth it! I love you!" I dropped the rope, and
hugged her. If my sister hadn't walked in that day,
I wouldn't be here today.
E x a c t l y o n e y e a
r a g o ...
I lost my best friend. I remember the
day so clear. I was watching my younger sister, Marie(She was
nine at the time), and Jacob, my best friend, and crush at the
time texts me. "Hey Alex wanna come over? Watch a
movie?" he asked. I was furious with my mom,
because she was making me watch my sister. "Sorry,
I can't, I'm watching Marie :/" I
replied. Before he replied, I realized something was wrong, I
couldn't find Marie. I checked her room, and there she was
cuddled up on her bed, eyes wide open. It was only seven
at night. "Marie? Are you okay?" I asked. She
shook her head. She told me that something was wrong, but when
I asked her what, she couldn't explain it. Just then, Jacob
texted back. "Don't worry about it, I'll
drive over there, and we'll all watch
movies." At the time, I just thought Marie
wasn't feeling well, little did I know it was so much more.
That night, while Jacob was driving to my house, a drunk driver
hit him, his car flipped over five times, and then stopped in
the wrong lane, where he was hit by a delivery truck. Jacob was
immediately sent to the hospital, with little chance of
surviving. When I heard what happened, the next day, I drove to
the hospital quickly, and found Jacob's room. Jacob was
already dead the time I got there, his mom and step-dad were
sobbing next to me. She was holding a note, that the police
found in his jacket pocket, it was tattered, but I could still
just barley make out the words.
"I love you, Alex, always have,
always will. Love, Jacob."