hey_i_love_witty

When you have the perfect boyfriend who calls you perfect and the best girlfriend in the world. A boy who also send you cute texts telling you that he will always love you for who you are...

when you and a friend hashtag everything

Our parents say eating carrots is good for us because it helps us see in the dark.
Well arent we supposed to be sleeping when its dark?

"I can hear the fat kid running. I bet its hilarious"
-Ted

"Somewhere out there, there are four terrible fathers I wish I could thanks for this great night"
 

-Ted

Dad: Dont eat that ice-cream too quickly or you'll get brain freeze...
Sister: Okay
Dad: ...But you dont have a problem with that
Sister: Why?