Hey, its ALEXX..
live laugh love smile pray :)
simply me ~
I hadn't
seen
* him * in awhile
i mean
the last time i saw him we kissed and then after that it was
like i didn't exisit..So i told myself over and over that
tonight i wasn't going to talk to him i wasn't even
going to look in his direction.
I swore i was still "mad" at him and that i didn't
wanna see him but
i knew deep down i did wanna see him :/
When i got to the graduation i sat two seats in front of him
and
didn't look back but with the corner of my eye i could see
him
perfectly. He looked so much cuter and all my feelings came back
but
i sat there like nothing with a fake smile on my face through the
entire graduation.. I saw him look at me a couple of times and my
heart sank
but i still didn't say a word. Later on at the grad. party i
tried my hardest not to look at him or waalk by him but it was
impossible.
The moment i was serving drinks inside and he walked in i
knew
the he was the one i wouldnt stop liking. He gave me a smile and
said if i could give him some soda and i blushed ((of
course)) and replied with
yeah sure:)
That night i decided to just go and talk to him so i did and we
played basketball together, it felt like a dream that him and i
were here together alone but he brought up that night and i
couldnt help it and just tell him everything i felt.. When i
finished he looked at me speechlessly and then told me
exactly how he felt about me and he finished his explanation
with
"There hasn't been a moment where i havent thought of
you and how beautiful you are.. Honestly" and at that moment
i knew i was falling for him because i went up to him and kissed
him without second guessing and guess what... He didnt pull
away
<3
happened Friday(:
It's
always me..
i have i text you
first
i have to say hi first
i have to make conversation
But why?
Why is it so hard for you to just say hey
and ask me how my day is..
You don't know how much it hurts
to feel like im not wanted by you
I can't keep waiting for you to come around
anymore
I need to move on because honestly you do
nothing but hurt the hell out of me and all i
wanna do is be happy like i use to
be...</3
not my format
IxWishedxForxOne
simple thing at 11:11
and that was for him to just
text me back that night for once..
An hour went by and still nothing
so i just decided to go to sleep..
When i looked at my phone one last time i had three new messages
2 from my best friends and the last one was him(:
at that moment i started to believe again
<3
happened last night!:)
I look at my phone as it's
vibrating
and i see your name appear and all the memories
come back to me in an instant.. The crap you put me
through and all the tears i cried.
As we talk on the phone im telling myself
over and over not to cry, im strong.
As we said our last goodbye i new
i wouldnt hear from you again or at least for
awhile.. You came and left and i loved you a lot
so i didnt care i forgave you.. Tears stream down my face
as i think about this and i cant take it anymore
Sad thing is a guy didnt cause me this pain
it was my dad and how he left me and my mom
like nothing but we took him back and
i have to live with the fights and everything
i wish i didnt but those memories will always stick
is it sad to say you don't know if you love your
own blood?
the person that made you?
Thanks dad for showing me what guys are capable off.
</3