juliap29

girl: im so proud of my boyfriend.

friend: why?

girl: cause there was this time, he was so drunk and he didnt recognize me..

friend: why are you proud of that?
 

girl: cause when i was trying to remove his shirt and change it, he stopped me and said, "no stopp! i have a girlfriend"

childhood memory:

your moms here! quick hide so you dont have to go home!!

normal people flirting-
You are so sexy babe.
–wink-
-me flirting-
if you were a booger id pick you first.
-trying to wink but does weird eye twitch-

i hate the new witty...

Pink: Pretty pretty please! If you ever ever feel, like you're nothing, you are perfect...to me.

Me: Thank you, Pink!

Hannah Montana: Nobody's perfect!

Me: :(

Selena Gomez: Who said, who said you're not perfect?

Me:...Hannah Montana....

Cop: Why were you speeding?
Me: I was going to the store to get oreos
Cop: Double stuffed?
Me: Of course
Cop: Carry on

love should come with an instuction manual.

sue: dearly beloved we are gathered here today to join sue sylvester and sue sylvester in holy matrimony.
mom: this is insane.
sue: sue do you take sue  to be your lofley wedded spouse? i do.
sue: and sue do you take sue to be your lofleyt wedded spouse? i do.
sue: by the power invested in me, by a website i hear by pronounce you sue and sue.
mom:
sue: you may kiss yourself. (kiss kiss)
mom:
sue:
sue:
mom:
sue:
mom: im sorry but this is crazy.
sue: well.... YOLO.





glee<3

when i was younger i would stand next to my mom while she took the clothes out of the drier then i would wrap myself around them just to feel the warmth(:
 

just me?