kenken526

My Brother: Kendall you need to get in a abusive relationship so I can beat them up.
My Mom: Kendall would never date anyone who would do that!
Me: I'll take what I can get.

Me: *Sneaks up on friend*
Friend: *screams*
Friend: "Oh I thought you were a pedestrian!"
Me: "Well I guess I am a pedestrian... But whaddaya mean?"
Friend: "Pedestrian, you know like a man who you know with little girls..."
Me: *Laughing so hard I'm shaking, but no noise is coming out.*
Me: "You mean pedophile?"
Friend: "Well know I feel stupid.."
Me: "It's O.K. I used to think pedestrians were a religion."



True story.

  Kids Bop covered What Makes You Beautiful.                         

*facepalm*

 

                          
           Toms
                       
one for one. mf

 

If it was supposed to feel good, it wouldn't be called a crush.

Shoutout to my boyfriend in the hospital with a severe case of                 non-existence.

Cheese Jerky Rap

Jackson: I'm the man who had the cheese.

That moment when you realize the ABC song
is the same as "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star,"