If you're my boyfriend you're not
allowed to:
• Have
candles on your birthday cake
wtf are you wishing for all your wishes came true when you met
me
• Kiss
another female besides me
You wanna say goodbye to grandma? You better chest bump her and
call it a day, boy
• Speak
to other females
idc if you're lost and need directions you better get on your
knees & ask Jesus to guide you or somethin
• Own
a GPS/SatNav
what' you tryna' do? Navigate your way out of this
relationship?
• Buy
glasses or contact lenses
why do you need your vision to improve? You seeing someone
else?
• Sneeze
in public
girls'll be like "bless you" wtf girl you're
already blessed you have ME
• Eat
Jalapenos/Chillies
they're hotter than me
• Buy
lightbulbs
i'm the only person that can light up your world. THE ONLY
ONE
• Listen
to another girl's relationship problems
a shoulder to cry on becomes a d/ck to ride on
• Watch
animal planet
you might see your ex
• Wear
shoes with laces on
you might trip and fall in love with someone better than me, better
wear them sketcher slips ons
• Be
good at maths
find ya "X" and you gonna wonder "Y" you're
single again
• Drink
milk
Whatchu need the strength for? Tryna get the strength to leave me?!
No not today
• Spray
Lynx in public
next thing you know hoes gonna be poppin' out beggin' for
his d/ck.