mztweety585

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Joined: February 16, 2012
Last Seen: 1 decade
user id: 274793

Tweety's world
   Live everyday as if
it were your last!!!!


 

 

Quotes by mztweety585

SEEINIS DECEIVIN
dreaminis believing
it's okay
not to be not okay 

Drunk Blonde

A blond is driving down a deserted highway when she gets pulled over.

The cop gets out of his car and asks if she has been drinking and she replies "No".

So he radios the station and asks what to do.

The cop at the station says "Is she a blond driving a lipstick red corvet?" and the cop replies "Yes".

So the other cop says "What you do is tell her to get out of the car and pull out your dick as you walk up to her".

So the cop does exactlly what the other cop says. The blond gets out of the car and he whips out his dick.

The blond "sighs" and says please not another breathalizer test 

 
comebacks

So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.

Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.

I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?

I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.

I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!

Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?

Don't you need a license to be that ugly?

I see the wheel is spinning, but the hamster looks dead.

If you had another brain, it would be lonely 

Silly Simon's sitting in
a shoe shine shop.
Where he sits he
shines, and where
he shines he sits

I'm not a pheasant plucker,
I'm a pheasant pluckers son.
And I'm only plucking pleasants
'till the pheasant plucker comes 

some times feel
im my own bestfriend

being secretly jealous of the girls that get asked to prom in a cute thoughtful way

having that one teacher you can tell anything to and get advice from

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thanks all