rach143

I hate being the “big” one in the group. I hate sticking out like a sore thumb in pictures. I hate that I can’t share clothes. I hate that guys take them over me because of the way I look. I hate that no matter what I do my love handles won’t go away.  I hate how I have no motivation to lose weight. I hate how no one will help me get motivated. I hate being the one everyone turns to. I hate that I hate the previous statement(I feel I need to be there for people). I hate people for getting my hopes up when they are just going to tear them down. I hate how sensitive I am. I hate how I care too much about what others think. I hate how my best friends left me. I hate making new friends. I hate being out of my comfort zone. I hate how I ruined one of the best relationships I had with a guy at school. I hate how I am so over-reactive. I hate how I care about others so much. I hate that I make it so easy to get hurt. I hate that I can’t tell anybody how I truly feel because I hate opening up. I hate how I love to eat. I hate that I live with two guys and no girls. I hate that I am so masculine. I hate that I sweat a lot. I hate how music is the only thing that can keep me sane. 

Why can’t I be skinny? Why can’t I just have the confidence I so desperately need? Why does it seem that no one cares? Why? Why? Why do I feel like ripping my hair out? Why can’t I shake these feelings?

How can anyone expect me to accept my body for being different when all we see nowadays is that thin is beautiful?

The pain, the pain we feel inside
The pain caused by the great divide
We taunt and tease and rip apart,
The strengths and prides in the heart.
 
Day after day we find a way,
To poke and prod the feelings at bay.
Those lives we touch can seem so fine
We forget to look and find the sign.
 
The day they leave is the day we find
The pain and anguish hidden behind.
Forever remembered by their death,
Never forgotten because their last breath.
 
We say we’re sorry and all is fine
Except for those who are in the shrine.
Forever haunted by what they feel
Wishing its grasp was a slippery eel.
 
All lives are important and don’t forget
It’s never okay to give a threat.
Forever together, we can’t lose

No more death on the news

Thank you for reading this if you took the time.  It is a project for school about bullying and suicide. If you have any edits or comments, please leave them <3

http://www.itgetsbetter.org/
It Gets Better. I Promise. If anyone ever needs to talk, I will be here. I will always stick up for you and will accept you no matter what. <3 this if you will too.