My name is Shelby. I live in Dinosaur, Colorado. I know it may sound cool, but it sucks.
It's the most boring place you could ever go, and there is absolutely NOTHING to do.
I'm 13 years old, and I like to write to pass up time. (:
So, you want to kill yourself? Becuase no one cares about you.
Your
family hates you. Right? No. Your parents walking in your room in
the
morning only to find a dead body. They'll try their hardest
to not think
negative, and to just think that you're fooling around. Then
they'll start
shaking you. Why aren't you breathing? They'll be broken.
Tears. Many
tears. More tears. Pain. Every day. Every night. Every single
second of
every day. Guilt. More guilt. What about your best friends?
They're not
going to care. Right? No. What's the first thing going
through their mind
when the principle comes in and tells the class you're not
alive. While
your best friend sits there in tears. That girl you'd always
smile at but
never talk to? She's now crying. The boy who used to kick you
under
the table just to annoy you? He'll be shocked. He'll be
devestated.
He'll blame himself. What about your teacher? Thoughts
crossing her
mind. She'll question if you did it because she didn't
make school
comfortable enough for you. Pain. Devastation. All in one.
Who
organzies your funeral? Who has to go through your stuff?
Clothes?
Notes? Those few older girls who used to give you daggers at
school?
They'll feel regret. They'll blame themselves. See, if
you killed yourself
today, you'll never know what might of happened tomorrow.
You'll
never know because you're dead. Plain dead. Not breathing.
Not alive.
Just dead. Your family hates themselves for it. Your best friend
then
falls into depression. Tears. Tears. More tears than a river. All
because
you killed yourself because you thought no one would care. Right?
You
are loved by many. Someone right now is thinking of you. And
right now,
I'm thinking about anyone who has thought, or is considering
suicide. You
are beautiful. No matter if your black, white, homosexual, tall,
short, overweight,
or anorexic. You are beautiful. You want to kill yourself? Think
about it first.
There's no coming back. And I promise, if you do it,
you're not only hurtning
yourself, you are hurting many. You are creating more tears than
you lead yourself
to. You are making everyone miserable and making them all feel
guilt, and pain.
Never will the feel whole like they used to when they had you.
You are beautiful,
and you are never ever alone.
notmine.