Down to the Second.
“Are you being serious?”
My mother looks at Walter, wild eyed. He nods.
“I used to live there, and I paid off the house a while
back, so I just decided to keep it as a vacation house. We can
move there, where Delilah won’t be hiding from the
cops.” He shrugs and looks at the ground. “It was
just an idea.” I’m shocked at how dedicated he is to
my mother, but I refuse to move to New York with him.
“What about Carter?” I ask my mother.
“He didn’t do anything wrong. Besides, doesn’t
he have a family here? I mean, Delilah, that’d be
kidnapping.” I look at Carter, and he’s staring at
his shoes. “I think maybe Walter is right. I mean, how are
we supposed to continue living here when you murdered someone?
It’s only a matter of time before the cops come looking for
you! Wouldn’t you rather move than be arrested?”
“I don’t think you understand. My life is here. I
love Carter, and I don’t want to lose him. I
can’t just move away from him!” Imagining myself
without Carter literally hurts me. He’s saved me every time
I’ve needed saving, and we’ve grown too close to be
“Honey, I know this will be hard for you, but what other
choice do we have? If you stay here, you’ll be put in jail,
without a doubt! You won’t be with Carter anyway!”
This makes me mad.
“Then we’ll just runaway together…right
Carter?” I look at him, and his eyes meet mine
“Well, I don’t know if I can do that,
D…” He stampers over his words, making me
“Can I talk to you upstairs for a minute?” I ask
Carter, and he nods. “Excuse us.” I say to my mom,
heading up the stairs and going into my room with Carter.
“What the he/l is wrong with you? Do you want me
to move to New York? We’ll never see each other again! I
thought…” I stop, getting emotional. “Forget
it.” I say, pulling my suitcase from under my bed.
“I’ll leave, and move to New York with my mother and
her horrible boyfriend, and you can find someone else to obsess
over.” I open my dresser and start throwing my clothes into
the bag angrily, and Carter grabs my hand to stop me.
“Delilah, how many times have I proved to you that I love
you? From that night at that stupid Ball, I haven’t stopped
thinking about you. I took care of you when you got lost at that
party, drunk off your a/s, and I saved you when you were
nearly killed at Sherman’s. I was arrested because of you,
and yet, I still love you, and you know what Delilah? We’re
not even officially dating. I can’t even call you my
girlfriend, something that I’ve wanted to do since the
second I laid eyes on you.” My heart feels heavy suddenly,
and I stare into his eyes. “I don’t want you to move
to New York, D, but I also don’t want to see you rot in
jail. So I don’t know what to do.” He must be able to
tell how upset I am, because he wraps his arms around me gently,
cloaking me in his wonderful smell and warmth. I start to cry,
trying not to, but not able to hold it in. He grabs my face
gently and lifts it so that I’m looking right at him.
“I love you, Delilah Shawn.”
“Carter…” I whimper. Those words scare me more
than anything. Every time I’ve heard it from a man,
they’ve turned their backs on me. That’s why I
don’t commit to just one guy.
“What? Don’t you love me? I mean, you just told your
mother that you do…”
“It’s not that Carter…I’m just
“You don’t have to be…it’s me. I’d
never hurt you.” I kiss him suddenly, hoping that I can
show him that I love him without actually saying it, because
it’s the words that frighten me so much, not the actions.
He pulls me over to my bed and we lie down, still kissing softly.
I move on top of him, kissing him harder, happy that I locked my
bedroom door. His arms wrap around my lower back, close to my
butt. He seems hesitant, like every other time we’ve really
kissed, so I stop kissing him for a moment and just look at him.
I give him a look to tell him that this is okay, and he starts
taking initiative, rolling on top of me and kissing down my neck
and whispering sweet nothings in my ear. My nails scratch down
his back, and I yank off his shirt quickly, kissing down his
chest. I feel the hair on the back of his neck raise, so I
continue until he finally loses control and pins me down, kissing
me toughly while wriggling off my shirt. He manages to quickly
get my shirt and bra off, while I get his pants off, leaving him
in only his underwear. He starts working at my pants after
looking at me one last time to make sure I was comfortable with
it. I simply nod at him, and he pulls them off with little
hardship, which was surprising considering I was wearing skinny
jeans. After that, I realize that this wasn’t going to
stop, so I reach into my nightstand and grab a condom, and from
there, it was the best night of my life.