whatdoidoo

Status: attempting to enjoy the baffling journey that is my life.
Joined: July 21, 2016
Last Seen: 3 years
user id: 397008
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❝True friendship is when two friends can walk in opposite directions, yet remain side by side." - Josh Grayson, Sia
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catherine//usa//devotee of the office, baby goats and french fries
i like using this website as a home for my ramblings. what's going on?

whatdoidoo's Favorite Quotes

“Passion has little to do with euphoria and everything to do with patience. It is not about feeling good. It is about endurance. Like patience, passion comes from the same Latin root: pati. It does not mean to flow with exuberance. It means to suffer.”

Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves

       

         
the honest to
              GOD TRUTH IS              
that i'm mad at myself. I SHOULD'VE KNOWN BETTER.
 

 


I've known girls like you.
Girls who are two shots
of whiskey straight,
and chain smoking,
thigh highs and red lipstick
and a mean old twisted mouth.

I've known girls like you at night,
you turn yourself into something new.
You're all soft inside,
you're all sadness and bite
and limpid, starless eyes,
calling random numbers in the dark
just so you can hear a new voice,
just so someone can say ‘who's this?’
And finally you can breathe again
because you're a person again,
you're a who,
you're not a casual f.uck in a bar,
not a wolf whistle
or a left behind, or an afterthought.

Baby, you're all heart and hands,
you're all deconstruction,
collapsed stomach and lungs,
scowling whilst you apologize for existing,
frowning as you look for warmth in bodies
that do not belong to you.

Wait, I want to tell you,
stop smudging your eyeliner,
stop turning yourself inside out.

Wait, I want to say,
your hips are more than a hotel,
wait for it–

your body is a place to stay.

—Azra Tabassum, Ruin Does Not Look Like You






 “1. Kiss boys whose mouths taste like plums and liquorice,
take, but do not give,
do not surrender to the urge to fall.
2. Kiss girls who are silk beneath your hands,
swell around them until you become waterlogged, heaving.

3. Leave forest fires alone,
do not look for smoke, when your body starts to burn
stay away from trees, get the hose.

4. You are not an apology,
do not treat yourself like one,
your lips are perfect for kissing,
your hips do not spell ‘sorry’.

5. The roar of your voice is a lightning storm.
This is why the sky excites you,
because you were born from it.

6. They'll tell you that you are ruined.
Don't listen. You are not an abandoned train station,
you are poetry in motion.

7. There will be leaves in your hair from climbing trees
and falling from them,
sometimes it is good to hurtle.

8. Loosen yourself into elastic
the next time someone touches you.
Remember: you are not an apology,
you belong solely to yourself.”


— Lessons

                      
 
                                                            



 “1. Hold everything very carefully unless it is your lover's back. Then, become metal, become teeth, do not gentle yourself for any man. Do not change for the ones who think that you should be softer, less mouth, less voice. You do not owe regrowth to anyone but yourself. When they begin to ask for you to shape yourself around them, leave. Shut the door firmly. Do not look back.

2. Do not waste what you have, use the skin. Lick the insides until there are seeds in your teeth. Share fruit with others, share fruit with your lover. Use your mouth and your tongue to discuss the inner anatomy of a melon. Remember that it is the sweetest on the 28th day, remember that when you open it, it will spill over your hands and his. Lap it up, after, bathe together. Later, you will find seeds between your thighs. Wash again, they lied about cherry trees growing in your stomach, but you never know.

If the pulp is running down your arms, lick off the excess before it reaches your elbows. It's a b.itch to get off, you will have to shower and you will find it everywhere– in your hair, and in all the lines within your palms. You'll taste sweet for days. He'll love it, don't you worry and if he doesn't? Try kiwis instead.

3. I've seen you hold things between your hands and crush them until they are leaking out of the spaces between your fingers. Learn when you need to be gentle, learn to caress instead of squeeze. If you tighten yourself around something that does not want to have you, it will destroy itself trying to escape. It will turn inside out. Do not force it, sigh and let it go. We're not talking about fruit anymore, I hope you know that.

4. There is a secret to the perfect cut and it is all in the holding of the fruit. Grip too tightly and you'll ruin it, not hard enough and it'll slip out of your fingers and your skin will learn the knife. Be careful with yourself, be careful with your hands and sharp objects. When you are eating avocado cut it through the middle, twist, pop out the seed. Do not attempt to eat the seed. This one tastes best in salad, try chicken.

5. When you are holding mangoes be careful with the skin, take too much off and you're wasting the fruit, not enough and it's bitter to the tongue. Take it with you when you fall in love. Be careful with the skin. At dawn take him by the shoulders and lift him to you. Take his mouth and his hands. Undress him softly and then undress him further. When he is shaking in your hands, put your mouth to his ears and tell him that you will love him for as long as you think you can. If it is forever, simply smile. Nibble his ear. Let the light touch him with you.”

— My Mother's Lessons on Peeling Fruit and Keeping Lovers

                      
 
                                                            

You will lie to everyone you love.
They will love you anyways.
One day you'll wake up and realize that you are too big for your
own skin.
Molt.
Don't be afraid.
Your body is a house where the shutters blow in and out
against the windowpane.
You are a hurricane-prone area.
The glass will break through often.
But it's okay. I promise.

(S.M.)





I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know that there's nothing but light when I see you.

 

Let the world in and sooner or later people will see the oceans pouring out of you. You'll walk down the street and someone will mistake you for the sky. You are beautiful because you let yourself feel, and that is a brave thing indeed. Treasure the company of being alone. Think of solitude as another friend for you to hold hands with in the dark. You have clipped wings and scars from when people told you that you were too young and too human and too weak to try to scale the troposphere with your eyes closed, but you were born from the earth and you were born from a wave of your mother's love and you will end up in a horizon somewhere between the two.




YOU GOT TWO BLACK

EYES FROM LOVING

TOO HARD.


 



Sacrificing everything that you care about in order to make another person happy is not love. It’s not really that some people are gardeners and some people are flowers… It’s that we both must be both, each in our own time. —Tonight the Streets Are Ours