i know what you
think of me.
i'm happy, right? i'm smart, i hang out with
the "popular crowd", i'm
pretty, i'm sweet, people like me, i have lots of friends, i'm rich, i have a nice house, nice clothes, perfect body, my siblings are perfect, i have no care in
the world. no problems. just happiness.
if you saw me now, would you think differetly?
in sweat pants and a sweatshirt that are 100x too big?
my hair in a bun?
did you know i never wear make up?
i spent my saturday night
alone.
actually, my whole saturday alone.where are my beautiful
friends?
good question.
i watched movies all day.
and i ate ice cream.
did you know i threw it up?
maybe that's how my body's so
perfect.
did you know i made my first scar in my hip tonight?
did you know i cry alot?
did you know i don't know how to deal with my emotions?
do you realize what happens when i
get frusturated?
did you know i can't handle myself?
do you understand how insecure i
am?
how anxious and nervous i always am?
how i'm paranoid my future will be
a fail?
that i'm developing fears over everything?
that i burst into tears for no
reason?
no. i bet you didn't know any of that.
what do you think of me
now?
exactly.
that's why i hide
it.