1. People who point at their wrist asking for
the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is
yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet
2. People who are willing to get off their a** to search the
entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the
TV and change the channel manually.
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and
eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat
4. When people say "it's always the last place you
look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking
after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are
5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see
that?" No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare
at the damn floor!
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't
give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved'. Which is it? If it's
new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an
improvement, then there must have been something before it,
couldn't be new.
8. When people say "life is short". What the hell???
Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!!! What can you
do thats longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has
the bus come yet?" If the bus came, would I be standing