"so how long have you been waiting
here?" i asked, wiping under my eyes.
"not that long. you've been on my mind all day, i had
to talk to you, or i wouldn't have been able to sleep."
"well it looks like you're ready to sleep now." i poked
at the dark circles under his eyes. i walked over and sat on a
couch i had in my room. he came over, and i laid down in
"so you really do like me." i said.
"like is an understatement. i think you are the most
amazing, beautiful, wonderful girl i've ever met." he
"and you are the craziest, hottest, most remarkable skater
boy i've ever met." he laughed.
"i'm not a complete skater boy. i used to play
basketball." he said.
"yea same, but i guess i went all gun ho in lacrosse, so i
"listen, rach. about what i said today."
"no, don't worry about it. i'm trying, i really
"but he was such a huge part of you, it's okay." he
"no, but you're right. it's not fair to you. he is, i
guess, really gone." i said, a tear running down the side of
my face. he wiped it.
"and that's not your fault." he said.
"and it wasn't his either. i can't tell you how many
times i've wished i was the one in the driver's seat, so he
could've lived. his life was worth so much more than mine
"but then we wouldn't be here." he said, and gripped me
"as soon as i met you, that's when you started changing my
mind." i admitted.
"what?" he asked.
"being with you, was making everything a lot more
bearable. i didn't open that scrapbook until this
morning. and you know why?"
"why?" he whispered, matching my volume.
"because you made me strong enough to face my fears.
and now i can say i don't have to wake up and feel so alone
anymore." i smiled, and he turned me around, and kissed
"i can't believe this is happening to me. none of this
ever happened at my other schools." i said.
"you probably just weren't looking hard enough." he
"i wasn't really looking that hard." i said.
"i was." he smiled.
"and look what you're stuck with." i smiled.
"ah, i'm pretty sure it's worth it." he said, and
"awh, you look tired. you can just stay here." i
offered, my phone said that it was 12, and i was pretty
"your parents wont flip?" he asked.
"will yours?" i asked.
"well, no.." he began.
"what? tell me." i said.
"well, my mom died when i was 6, and my dad's stationed in
Germany. my older sister is home now, and she's taking care
"oh my gosh, steve. why didn't you tell me?" i
asked, and i gave him a hug.
"it wasn't really a big deal." he said.
"but steve, you can tell me anything." i said.
"i know that now." he smiled.
"but you can stay, right?" i asked.
"yes." he smiled.
"alright, do you mind if i take a shower really quick?"
i tugged at my wet, chlorine-infested hair.
"go right ahead." he said.
"you can go on my computer, or do whatever, just be
quiet. my parents are sleeping." i smiled, and ran
with my towel to take a shower.