Quotes added on Thursday, September 2 2010

lemme dream the
pain away   

Format Credit: CMPSunday
have a bad day ?

es a witty quote for that ;)

you know its true!
click the heart :) <3

n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n

Don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful.
They can all get fxcked, just
stay true to you.

n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n 

so i deleted my facebook last month.
i thought it would help my GPA.
afterall, its the biggest distraction out there.
yet, here i find myself. 12am, sitting on my bed.
books everywhere, laptop in use.
witty profiles in one window, and my best friend's
facebook in another.
oh, and chemistry. yeah i have a window for that too...
so yes i realize i have hit a low point. back to work.

My Best Friend Gave Me A Balloon,

It was weird, but I thanked him and brought it home. That night, my 4 year old sister was playing with it, when she accidentally popped it.

At that moment, I saw a flash of silver. I looked to the ground in awe and saw a ring, along with a note asking me to go to prom with him


Where i need to be part 21
Brandon and Allie. Allie and Brandon. Kissing? In the stables? No this couldn't be happening. But the smell of horses, the feeling on Mary Lou's arm on mine, and the slight throbbing in my ankle brought me back to reality. And as unbelievable as it was, and terrible. Allie and Brandon kissing in the stables was my reality. My hand went to my throat. I could feel the lump in my throat growing bigger and the tears on the brink on overflow.
Brandon threw Allie off of him. "What the hell do you think your doing Allie!?!?" he yelled. He looked at me and all the anger he had just shown melted away into pure sorrow. Or was it guilt?
"Scarlett, baby, I'm so sorry you had to see that. It's not what you think i swear. Scar!" he yelled after me as i tore off running. I didn't care that my ankle hurt, i didn't care if he was or wasn't coming after me. I just needed to get away. Away from my reality.
I kept running. I didn't want to stop. Or I couldn't. I ran down the road, away from the house and towards the beach where Luke tried to... i didn't want to think about that either. I just wanted to run.
I came to the beach and never stopped. I ran down to the shore line. Then i stopped and sat down. The waves were crashing into me and it seemed as if they were trying to knock me right over. like everyone else today had. My cheeks were wet from either tears or the ocean spray. All of my thoughts were racing through my head like a train. Round and round.
How could he? Why? I thought...  I thought he loved me. He promised me. Swore to me in kindergarten that he wouldn't ever let me cry. Well screw that! Suddenly i could hear footsteps behind me. O jeez. If it was Brandon... well i don't know what i would do. I stood up. Brushed myself off as well as i could, took a deep breath and turned around. I got the suprise of my life.
"Michael?" i said completely shocked. I thought i was going to see Brandon. But no i just saw my 14 year old cousin.
"Yup! Thats me! I saw you running and i followed you. I like it out here don't you?" He said plopping down on the ground. Lacy had mentioned that Michael had autism and was socially awkward and had a hard time talking and interacting with people.
"Yeah... its- nice." i said sitting down next to him.
"Why are your cheeks wet Scarlett? Hey that rhymes!" he said reaching up and touching my face.
"I was crying Michael." i said. He put his hand down.
"Mommy cries a lot. When i ask her why shes tells me its cause her baby boy is going away. Scarlett where is Tom going? And why can't i go with him?" he said his lower lip protruding and his eyes sparkling with tears.
"He's going to college Mike. And don't worry he'll visit! And maybe you can go and see him!" i said putting my arm around him and giving him a hug. The autism had made his emotional and mental abilities limited, so he had the capabilities of about a 5 year old.
"But why were you crying Scarlett?" he said looking up at me.
"Because i was sad."
"But you're getting married! You cant be sad!" he said sitting up fully. There it was. What i had been thinking all along had been thrown out in the open. Was i going to get married?
"I don't know if that's going to end up happening buddy..." i said in all honesty.
"But why?!?!" he starting to cry.
"Sweetie its- its hard to explain..." i said pulling him into another hug. I held him there for what seemed like hours. My own tears mixed with his as i started to cry. 

so i put this on six billion secrets, never got posted.
i dont know if you will like, but, what the hell :)
I sit there, looking out the window, gazing out into nowhere.
I'm listening to my ipod, a song that reminds me of you.
In that spot that i'm gazing out to, i'm picturing:
you & me & what we could be. i'm picturing:
a random fantasy, a want, a dream. I'm picturing:
every little kiss and smile, running, hugging,
it would be worth the while.
just you & me, baby.

i think im finally done; i've never been one to just give up, but i cant do it anymore.

Everyone, and everything is beautiful.. 
but not everyone see's it <3

remember you're beautiful<3

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