Quotes added on Saturday, May 28 2011

And for the first time i didn't go straight for the "break up" category instead i went to the "inspirational" one

Because i Need hope

i don't blame you for staying away from me.
i say the wrong things. i complain a lot. i screw things up.
i'm moody. i'm not easy to get along with. i'm insecure.
i'm too hard on myself. i know i can do better. i'm lazy.

but if you stay through all the bad;
i promise you'll get all the good.

major vent.


 the deeper he cuts the longer i hurt the deeper we cut things only get darker...they say that we're hurting eachother...they tell me that i'm dying inside...but the only time i've ever been dying...was when they tore me away from him...so i stole him away, like a theif in the night...what they did was wrong...but he drew blood for me...and i'll do the same for him...i adore him...he is my heart...so every cut is worth it...<3

Show me what I'm looking for.

Y o u  k n o w  h o w  t h e y  s a y  y o u r  l i f e  f l a s h e s  b y  b e f o r e  y o u  d i e ?
If  y o u  w e r e  t o  d i e  r i g h t  n o w . . . 
W o u l d  y o u r  l i f e  b e  w o r t h  w a t c h i n g ?


Me: It's easy to pretend, it makes everything easier,
even for a little bit.

Him: You don't need to pretend around me, never ever

Lives on the corner of funny street and silly road, In crazy Town which is in psycho valley, in a twisted state of mind!!! ;)

Love Lilly
part 13. :]

I sat on the couch in between Jack and Josh and watched the show they were in the middle of watching. I sat there quietly still waking up and still tired. Then Jack's phone started going off. I peeked as he answered. All i could make out was Kath. I sighed as he walked away to talk to her.
"What's wrong.." Josh asked hearing my sad/angry sigh.
"i really don't like the girl he's talking to right now.." i said and rose my leg up against my chest and laid my chin on my knee.
"oh, but you do know that he does really like you a lot right? and no matter the girl, he's not going to cheat on you, he's not that type of guy.." Josh said i just nodded. It's sad to say that im jealous of a girl i just met yesterday, and Jack i only started dating a couple of days ago and it's not even official yet. I guess that's why im so upset, Since it's not official, he can go out and flirt with her and stuff and i can't stop it unless i want to be creepy and obsessive.
"you needa stop worrying about it.. the type of relationship him and that girl have is probably nothing compared to what you're worrying about right now.." he said trying to make me feel better. I just nodded. Jack came back
"Marc wants me back at the studio today, are you ok with that." he asked. No...
"yeah, it's fine." i smiled. He smiled back and kissed me, then walked to the door.
"If you need me call or text me!" I sighed as the door closed.
"ooooooh!! i know who you're jealous of!" Josh said like he just solved a life changing mystery.
"yeah. And?" i asked with a laugh from his expression.
"she's a character alright.." hes said laughing and rolling his eyes
"but like i said, they're relationship is nothing." he shrugged
"thank god." he added under his breath. I laughed then walked in the kitchen for food
"make me a Sandwich." he shouted
"bring me to Florida." i shouted back
"fine.." he sighed annoyed and got up and walked over to the fridge.
"i don't think he has any deli meat.." i said cutting the toaster bagel in half.
"yeah, he does, not a lot, but he does.." he said starting to make a sandwich.
-yooo.. Crystal gave me three passes to tonights teen night... u in? ;]- text from Zoe.
-well yeah. me, u and herr.. ill pick u up after school, well get ready together and goo..-
-ommg No u haaab tooo.. pees :( -
-YAY! :D oh, i have to stay after school for science, so ill pick u up like 3:30ish? doors open at 7..-
-ahahaha.. seeyah later chikaa.-
i do feel bad, cause i don't want to make Jack upset.. but, were not official so just like i can't control him, he can't control me.... right? ugh.. i sighed loudly from stress and Josh eyed me oddly then walked back to the den.
"what's up miss cranky pants.." he asked
"stress..." i said and plopped down next to him with the mini toaster bagel in my hand.. i wasn't even hungry anymore..
"from?" he asked and lowered the volume of the tv.
"Zoe wants me to go to tonights teen night with her and crystal and i don't know if i should go..." i sighed again
"oh.. really?" he looked up at the tv
"SEE! this is why i don't wanna go! cause i already feel guilty just seeing your face like that!!" i said and put my hands over my face.
"he wont know.." he said
"whatya mean..." i asked confused.
"i wont tell him.." he said
"really.." i asked slowly
"really really." he said. a thousand pounds were lifted off my shoulders.
"when are you guys getting home.." he asked
"like.. 12ish im assuming.." i shrugged
"ok.. ill keep him busy till then.." he said.
"thanks so much!" i said. He nodded. I could tell he's still upset though. I looked at the cable box and it said that it was 2:30 already. I sighed and got up to take a shower. when i got out i blow dried my hair and left it natural. I put on shorts cause it looks hot out today, then i put on my sneakers and a t-shirt. I grabbed my purse and phone then walked down when i heard Zoe walk in. Josh acted like he didn't know where we were going and Zoe didn't bring it up.
"ready?" she asked with a smile. I nodded then we said bye to Josh and we walked to her car, It was so hot and humid out. Crystal was in the back so i sat in the front and we went to Zoe's house to get ready. When we got up to her room she entered her huge walk in closet.
"Um... I don't know what you guys want to wear... but dresses are in there, and skirts, and tank tops and stuff like that.." she said putting on a short dress. Me and Crystal nodded and walked to her closet.
"are you wearing a dress." i asked looking through her clothes
"i don't know.. probably not, cause when you dance it's gunna rise up and its probably going to get annoying really fast." she said, I nodded.
"you should try this on.." she said and tossed me a flowery romper. I put it on and she nodded with a huge smile. She put on white shorts that have light blue small flowers all over it, and a white spaghetti strap tank top and we both put on sandals.
"oh my god you guys look so cute!!" Zoe squeaked. We both laughed and we started getting ready. blasting music in her empty house
"are you telling Josh.." I asked Zoe
"are you telling Jack.." she asked
"yeah... it should be ok though, since we're not offical, and im not gunna be hooking up with anyone there.." i shrugged she just nodded thinking then she took out her phone, i guess texting Josh
"you're going to text Jack and tell him now, since i did." she stuck out her tongue. I laughed and listened to her.
-hey, im going to a teen night tonight with Zoe and Crystal..-
no response.
"did Josh answer you?" i asked curling my hair.
"yeah, why.." she asked
"Jack didn't.. Is Josh mad.." i asked
"nah, he's happy i told him, why do you think he's not answering you.." she asked
"i have no clue.." i hope it has something to do with him recording, but then again i hope it doesn't, cause that can involve Kathleen. I put makeup on and then we walked down to her kitchen to get food.
-Steve are my glasses still alive?-
-lmfao, ill go check.- I can feel my contacts bothering me. Ill use them tonight then ill use my glasses until i get a new prescription.
-yeah, want me to drop them off?-
-im at Zoe's.-
-ok. be there in a sec.-
"do you want grilled cheese.." Zoe asked looking in her fridge.
"im in the mood for pasta.." Crystal said spinning her water bottle
"hmmm.." Zoe sighed and opened her freezer.
"you want pasta Steph?" she asked. I wasn't hungry, im just too stressed and worried about what's going on with Jack.
"sure.." i smiled. She took out the frozen raviolis and started boiling the water. Steve came in and gave me my glasses in their case. I ran upstairs to put it in my bag. When i walked downstairs we ate and talked then it was time to go, and my heart was beating out of my chest and i felt so guilty it was killing me.
if anyone read farther into the bible....

you cant fu**ing predict the end of the world!!!

what a bunchof stuck up prophit a**-holes....

You gotta love it when you're walking
somewhere, and someone screams
out the window at you.

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