Quotes added on Sunday, December 23 2012

I just found out that the love of my life, likes me too. My life is complete.   

Me: *Blows my nose*
Me: I think I'm gonna get sick right before Christmas..
Me: And, I'm gonna get my period..
Me: So every time I sneeze.. oh.. oh gosh, just no.
My bestfriend: I love you... *laughs*

You'll get it if you're a girl.

We brushed hands yesterday.
It was on accident, really. 
You were trying to make me lose that stupid game,
And I was trying to win that stupid game.
B u  t     w  e     s t  i  l l     d  i  d      i  t. 
And now; well now I'm not sure how I feel about you.
Because I think I might actually be falling for you. 
I've been watching
"Phantom Of the Opera"
for the past 5 hours...

so far...
Nobody Compares
A One Direction/Ed Sheeran Fan-Fiction
Chapter Five

Zayn handed me my camera and we all headed back inside. We played Truth or Dare for a few more hours, and then a rather interesting dare was given.
“Liam,” Harry said an evil look in his eyes, “I dare you to kiss the person you’re attracted to in this room.”
Liam looked at me and smiled weakly. “It’s just a dare,” he said. “You don’t have to.”
“But I want to,” I said and his smile went from weak to happy.
“Hurry it up!” Harry whined and then Niall got up and went into the kitchen.
I looked back at Liam and he started to lean in. I closed my eyes as his lips crashed onto mine and then I heard the door open.
Liam’s lips immediately left mine and he sat across the room from me.
“Ed, calm down,” I said, “it’s not that bad it was just a dare.”
“I told you not to get anywhere near those boys,” he said.
“Well next time, don’t send extremely attractive boys to my house,” I said and the guys and Abby chuckled.
Ed breathed slowly and then smiled. “I’m just going to imagine myself running through a meadow of daisies and maybe that will help me calm the heck down.”
“Good idea, Eddybear,” I said. “Hey where’s Niall?”
“He took off right before you kissed Liam,” Louis said, just as confused as me.
“I’ll go find him,” I said, getting up.
I went into the kitchen and found him sitting at the table.
“You alright?” I asked, sitting down in a chair across from him.
When Max was right about to kiss Liam I had to get up and walk away. Truth is, ever since Ed started telling us about her, at the beginning of the year, I’ve been checking out her YouTube channel, and I followed her on Twitter. I don’t think Ed knows she sings because he never brings it up. He never brings YouTube up either… Anyway, I do have a crush on her but she CAN’T know. She obviously likes Liam and he obviously likes her. Whether I’ve liked her longer or not, she doesn’t even know me. I couldn’t wait to meet her and knew I one day would… but I guess it doesn’t matter anyway.
After a few moments, I heard a door open and Ed start yelling. Max explained what went on and then I heard her come to find me.
“You alright?” Max asked, sitting down in a chair across from me.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I lied.
Truth is I couldn’t bear to watch her kiss Liam. I don’t even know why, I just got up because something told me I wouldn’t be able to handle it.
“Are you sure?” she asked and I forced myself to look at her eyes. Her piercing green eyes…
“Yeah,” I said, smiling, “I’m fine, really.”
“Well good,” she said, a smile now forming on her face. “Come on, Ed’s home.”
“Oh yeah,” I said, chuckling, “that’s why we came here in the first place.”
She laughed and we both headed into the living room. She sat on the couch and before I could sit next to her, Liam did. She flung his arm around her and Ed gave him a look.
“Watch it, Payne,” he said and Liam laughed.
“You don’t even trust me with Max?” he asked and Ed laughed.
“No,” he said, “I don’t trust Max’s father with her.”
“That’s really sweet,” Max said. “And really, oh, I don’t know, creepily over protective-like of you.”
Ed laughed and then Harry’s cellphone rang.
“Hello? No when did Abby post it? No her friend’s name is Abby. Yeah I’ll bring ‘em all over,” he said and then he hung up.
“That was Simon,” he said. “Abby, did you post that video to YouTube?”
“Yeah I did,” Abby said, “why?”
“Simon wants all of us,” Harry said. “You too, Ed.”
We all got into Harry’s car and drove to Simon’s office, which actually wasn’t too far from here.
“Hi, guys,” he said once we entered his office. “I’m just going to come out and say it. Niall and Max, I want you two to come out as girlfriend and boyfriend.”

theres always that one person
who when u start talkin to them
ur all happy and cheery
and ur smiling
but by the end of the conversation
u find urself hating urself
and crying
and wishing it wasn't that complicated

theres always that one person
who can make u smile
but at the same time make u cry

theres always that one person




"Droughts are for poor people. Do you
think J.Lo has a brown lawn?"

Fav, if you know
where this is from. :)


pamphlets pile the table
and conversations are replaced
tones are switched
and relationships become changed

he tells you
“this isn't our dream
we shouldn't be making your choices”
while she screams and screams and screams
hushing all of our voices

at night i feel something strange
it hasn't be here since ages
the feeling i've wanted to avoid
for so many years
i've been evasive

this feeling was what caused the ribbons
the ones that hug my arm
it caused the sessions and SSRIs


Chapter 7

I decided it didn't matter anymore. I needed to move on from Nick because nothing was ever going to bring him back. Unfortunately. I was his big sister. It was my job to keep him safe. That's part of the reason my parents hate me. Only a part. But a major part.

I was never into sports. I was into art mostly. Painting was my main hobby. Whenever I painted, I would be taken away from this world and I would be happy. My mom would hate when I painted. Just because I was "anti-social". Yeah, and I'm not the one that's messed up.

Actually, that was a lie. I am messed up. But, my whole family is. Except for Brenden. He's going to get somewhere someday. I swear it.

I love my family though. I do, I mean, I can't imagine them being anyother way. People tell me it's sad. But at least family always seem to be there for you. Friends aren't. I've mentioned before I don't have any friends. Or don't want any. There's just too much drama. Carter is the only friend I need. Once I get him, my life will be perfect. But until then, who knows what will happen.
How am I suppose to feel?
Do i actualy know what i want for once?
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