Quotes added on Saturday, February 2 2013

i don't know why people always look
behind the shower curtain before
they go to the toliet
Like what are you going to do
when they attack you?
Throw a toliet roll at them?

Battle Scars
Chapter 14
Ruby’s P.O.V.
ONE WEEK LATER

 
“They’re youtube queens at 17. Please welcome to the stage, Ruby Croft and Alaska Merino!”
We walk down the hall to come out to where the cameras are, with Kiss You playing in the backround. We both do a little dance before sitting down.
“So good to have you on the show, girls!”
“It’s so good to be here!” I reply.
“Now, I understand Alaska had her first trip to the beach yesterday…”
“Yes! It was awesome! The sand is wayyy softer than what I thought it would be like, and the water was nice and cold! I Made my first ever sandcastle. Ruby taught me how to surf! It was just awesome.” She said.
“What did you think the sand would feel like?”
“Sandpaper.”  The audience bursts out laughing, including me.
“I sound like Sophia Grace, Don’t I?”
“Yep.” I finish.
Again, the audience laughs.
“And Ruby! This accent you have, where is it from?”
“AOTEAROA REPRESENT!”
“Aotearoa?”
“That’s the Maori native’s name for New Zealand.”
“Okay.”
And then my awesome spacial awareness kicks in. There’s someone sneaking up behind us. And then I remember that sometimes Ellen sends people out to scare her guests.
So, thinking that was it, I waited, and kept answering questions, so I could pretend I was’nt scared when they crept up on us.
But then a minute passed.
And another minute.
And another minute.
They would have scared us by now.
So, when I answer the question “Who’s your fave member of One Direction?” with “I have no favourites, I just have a soft spot for Liam Payne.”, I turn my head around slightly.
And that’s when I saw them.
I turn my body round fully.
I pinch my stomach.
“I’m not dreaming, am i?”
They shake their heads.
I try to rationalise myself, and I start to talk to myself.
“Okay. Ruby, keep calm, and – oh, screw it. I am a fangirl, I CAN NOT KEEP CALM.”
And then, I start bobbling up and down in my seat, letting out a couple of high pitched squeals.
Ellen’s epicly laughing, and Alaska  is still unaware of what’s going on.
“What are you too laughing at?” asks Alaska.
I stop fangirling.
“You seriously don’t know.”
“I don’t know!”
“Look Behind You!” and then I resume fangirling.
Alaska turns around.
“HOLY HALOS IT’S LIKE THEY’RE PHOTOSHOPPED!” she squeals.
“I KNOW!” I shout.
Because standing right infront of me was…..
One Direction.

Teaser: 'Seriously. I just completed my bucket list right there, what else could i possibly get?'