Quotes added on Monday, April 29 2013

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When a package says "Easy open" and you end up using
scissors, knife, hammer, gun and a lightsaber
trying to open it..
FOR ONCE THE SMILE IS REAL
Learn, Feel

I feel empty,
Like a cup drained of its liquid,
A painting sucked of its color and lines,
Just to leave a blank canvas,
But I have no paints or brushes.

I don't know how to bring Something new to my dull life.
I only recall the faces I see every day,
Nothing new crosses these young eyes.
The ones who's laughter
Echos in my ears,
They are the lucky ones.
The ones who's smiles are not fake,
Painted on their faces with years of practice
As mine is.

I learn to laugh,
But it is not real,
I learn to smile,
But I feel nothing,
I learn to listen,
But I do not hear,
I learn not to burden others with my pain,
In fear of loosing those who stay close.

  I can learn, But I will never truly feel.
So honestly in just a year ,
I've found love , got a broken heart , lost some of the most amazing people in my life , Discover who I want to be , realized people can change for the worse , been betrayed by someone who I trusted the most , discover that people can hate you for no good reason . As im sitting here writing this with the tears in my eyes going through all these memories , good and bad I realized highschool is really gonna be the best and worst years of my life . Ive been through so much and I finally realize there is always gonna be someone who will understand what your going through . I only have 3 years left so Im going to make them the best . Im not gonna let the stupid people get in the way and im always gonna remeber the little things because no matter what those are the things im gonna look back on . Going to Homecoming , taking Finals , making my new bestfriends who actually stuck around for my downfalls , screaming down the halls then running from teachers so we didnt get yelled at , singing in class , copying homework because we stayed up to late talking , running from class to class so were not late because we seen our crushes and had to talk to them , fangirling over new cds, talking about next year , crying because I was having a rough time and it made them sad , fighting over who was cuter , telling eachother they were stupid because were just cool like that , getting called a B?tch and them telling the dude off . Realizing were gonna be friends forever , talking about getting matching tattoos and stuff , working on our music for our band , watching my bestfriend cry because she wanted to die so we wrote her a song and sang to her . Crying , laughing , annoying teachers and kids , being who we want to be , getting rejected for being to annoying and then laughing in his face becuse it was his loss , realizing the guy you love is a player and laughing and crying in the hall , yelling at a security guard because he was rude , being idiots in general , realizing some people just cant let stuff go , finding the boy you cant get out of your head and watching him fall for your cousin , eating icecream and screaming when your favorite song comes on , singing with your bestfriends , counting the days until someones birthday , waiting for summer to hurry , talking about going to concerts , dreaming about all the crazy stuff were gonna do , being there for eachother , being idiots and proud , remining each other that were beautiful no matter what . Being loved by one and other , hugging and being all giggly . waiting for summer so we can be crazy with out teachers around .

I love this . Just being who we are and not giving a flying freak . ... 
 
This is only year one ... 
and I honestly cannot 
wait for whats to come 
in the next three <3 

2012/2013<3 
 
But she's trying to heal herself, and 
she's doing the things that she did back before she broke. The love that she once knew returned to her heart, and forced out the hate, and once it was gone, she could finally be home again.
i know that you're scared

of telling me something i don't wanna hear

but baby believe that



i'm not leaving,

you couldn't give me one

goodreason

I just wanna dance and be free.
But there it is,
the most serious thing in the world, the deepest, strongest, most impossible, brilliant thing that there is. The love. 
she is sad
she is hurt
she is dying
she is alone
she is lonely
she is a mess
she is judged
she is ignored
she is suicidal
she is stressed
she is confused
she is depressed
she is misunderstood
she is tired but still living
she is hurt but wont show it
she is screaming but is silent
she is in pain but still smiling
she is me

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