A year ago, I wrote a very long letter elaborating upon
how I knew you were my soulmate. There used to be so much love,
and deeply warmhearted intentions. You made me laugh to the point
of tears and enjoying your presence was effortless. We would talk
for hours upon hours, and we were so captivated by one another.
Looking into each other's eyes made our worlds stop, and join
together, making us invincible for those moments. You protected
me and I cared for you. That was all I ever wanted to do. I can
trace back to every argument and every nasty comment and ever
nasty action to deliberately hurt one another, but that
doesn't mean I understand how things got to that point. I
haven't spoken to you in months, and I know better, I know I
shouldn't talk to you, but once upon a time, we were each
other's most prized possessions. We never ever wanted to let
each other go. And now we've moved on; you are with someone
else, but I'm in no rush for another relationship. When
people ask me if I truly loved you, I say 'yes' in a
heartbeat. I've become the biggest fool on this planet
because of how much I tried to make things work with you. All I
wanted was for you to be mine, and for me to take care of you so
you would want to be mine. And somehow along the way, we just
f/cked up, a lot. It's sad, you know? There was so much
potential I saw in us. I would go to bed every night and pictured
living together during college, getting married and having a
family. It all seemed so real to me, like it could really happen.
I thought it would. I did everything I coud to be with you, and
to love you with my whole heart, but there was so much in our
way. It was us against the world, and we have forgotten how to
work as a unit, so we were on our own. I don't let myself
think of you often, and I certainly don't let myself cry over
you, but when I see the way things have ended for us, and I still
don't completely understand how things went so wrong, it
severely frustrates me. You are the only man I have ever loved,
and it is just a dull stabbing pain in my chest every day I
remind myself that there is no more 'us' and there never
will be.
