Hot Funny Quotes


w
hen I turn 21...
I'll be legally able to do all the things I've been doing since age «13».









quote number 1123454
filed under funny
  528



AND   FAVORITE   THIS   IF  YOU  THINK  THERE  SHOULD  BE  A
M Y  L I F I S  A K W A R D



quote number 1130813
filed under funny
  507
AND IT WAS ONE OF THOSE DAYS
where if my pencil pencil broke,
i would've put my head down on my desk,

&cried.

quote number 1134843
filed under funny
  451
this is a so callelife...
     women's english ; 
yes = no
no = yes
maybe = no
we need = i want
i'm sorry = you'll be sorry
we need to talk = you're in trouble
sure, go ahead = you better not
do what you want = you'll pay for this later
i'm not upset = of course i am upset, you ass!
you're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?

         men's english ;
i'm hungry = i am hungry
i'm tired = i am tired
nice dress = nice cleavage!
i love you = let's have sex now
i'm bored = do you want to have sex?
may i take this dance? = i'd like to have sex with you
can i call you sometime? = i'd like to have sex with you
do you want to go to a movie? = i'd like to have sex with you
can i take you out to dinner? = i'd like to have sex with you
those shoes don't go with that outfit... = i'm gay
this could be helpful.
quote number 1125266
filed under funny
  429


C
all me a geek
?
i'll smile and agree
Call me insane?
i'll say, "yup, that's me."
Call me unpopular?
that's all you can do?
But if you call me fake
i'll say, "hun that's you."





ALL WORDS CREDIT TO xoEllentraceyxo
not mine at all. just my edit.
~Spo<3

quote number 1139961
filed under funny
  417
i'm the type of girl who...
 can [never] make up her mind about anything
trips over anything & everything
could never go a day without laughing
runs up the stairs at night because
shes scared something might be ---> chasing her
p r e t e n d s  to text in those akward sitchuations
saves those cute text messages <3
could live off of arizona iced tea :)
never leaves the house without her ipod
who's the last to realize "flo rida" spells florida
b u t   t h a t s   j u s t   m e .
 
quote number 1127918
filed under funny
  383
Today,
My teacher asked my class what we wanted to be when we grew up.
Most people wanted to be
-athletes
-movie stars
-actresses
-fashion designers
and what not.
When we got to me I smiled and said "UPS driver" I got weird looks from the entire class, and it was silent. I thought it would e best for me to explain, so I said,
"Well, for starters, you get to drive with the fricken door open, man. Two, you can listen to your ipod all day and you don't have to deal with people, because I'm not good at that.  You get to wear brown shorts, and you always look like a pimp. Your biggest problem is when there's some rabid dog, but then I could just throw the package, and hope it's not fragile.  And finally, you get to play a game at every house. You know what game I'm talking about, whenever the guy rings the doorbell, and you open the door, he's already driving away.  It's like, WHOAAAA, ninja driver!
but it's okay, because I already know the secret
(There isn't a door on the truck, so you can just hop in)


I got extra credit, for not being afraid to express myself.
quote number 1144471
filed under funny
  382
..don't you hate it when..
your crying, and your friend comes up to
you and asks "Are you crying?" It's like..
*No I'm just freaken peeing out of my eyes*



possibly last of series?
comment!
quote number 1149095
filed under funny
  371


the best things in life
are usually illegal  ♥  or full of calories



not my fades
quote number 1158580
filed under funny
  363
Are you questioning
M y b a d- a s s n e s s ?
quote number 1160825
filed under funny
  362

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