You're like
a drug. I can't get enough of you. And at the
beginning its not so bad. But I pull away from everyone else, my
friends and family, thinking I only need you.
But something tells me you're
dangerous, that something is wrong with you. I ignore it,
because you make me feel so good. You make me forget my problems.
But it takes a turn for the worst. It gets really bad,
so I decide to stop.
But then I realize how much I need
you, how much I had been relying on you. I feel...
empty inside. My friends
and family told me you weren't good for me. I nodded my head
but somehow couldn't believe you'd ever cause me harm. I
felt so much pain away from you, and you were the only thing that made it
better.
But I listened to them and I painfully got over you. Quitting cold turkey. By lack of your
presence. And finally I was done.
I didn't need you, but I still
wanted you, secretly. Everyone was so happy that I was
over you, but I wasn't. Not completely.
///////////
So I had a lapse in
recovery. I fell for you
again. It happens all the
time. I quickly caught myself before I fell too hard. This
time I had good friends around me to help me through.
///////////
And finally--FINALLY I could get
over you because I realized
that even I'd never know if you were the thing hurting me, if
I saw you as my bandage. So now, you don't exist to
me. And I never want you
back.