The Final Cry
Jessica's POV
Chapter 8.
I can do this. I thought to myelf. I shouldn't have eaten that sandwich, so it's up to me to pay the penalty. How can anyone love a fat girl? I pondered while hovering over the toilet. I had thrown up last week after eating, and I haven't eaten since. That is, until 2 hours ago when my hunger gave into me and I made myelf a sandwich. I wouldn't have even done it, but my mom was now home from visiting with my grandparents.
Who am I kidding? She didn't even notice me eating. She was too busy on the phone trying to make a new business deal. I bet she barely gave me 2 looks since she arrived home 3 days ago.
I was still contemplating whether to throw up or not so I looked around. The first thing I spotted was my hideous reflection. Again. It seemed to be the only thing I noticed these days, and within a few seconds of staring, I started to cry. The next thing my eyes found was the gift I bought myself last night. The latest issue of Sports Illustrated. The Swimsuit Edition. Seeing the thin model on the cover only made me realize how disgusting my fat body looked.
Without a second thought, my finger ran down my throat and I instantly puked up everything I had previously ate. It felt good to finally be getting thin.
This happend every night for a long time, and within a few days, I didn't even have time to think about what I was doing because my finger automatically found it's way down my throat.
In 3 days, I lost 7 lbs and added 10 cuts.
And I finally felt good enough.
Almost.
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